Real Men of National Football League

[Dirty Thirty]

got this idea off another board and found it hilarious...everyone write your own and keep em NFL related or specific team related.


"Today we salute you, Mr. Let's Pick Up Every FA Out There Suggester.

You take your years of playing Madden and bring that experience to the real world.
(I LOVE Franchise mode!)

Even our positions of strength aren't safe from your GM prowess.
(You can neverrrrrrr have enough depth)

Salary cap? Roster size limit? Those don't exist in the America you know.
(Vet minimum plus incentivvvvvvves)

So here's to you, Mr. Let's Pick Up Every FA Out There Suggester"

[bhaarat316]

ahah thats great

[TheBuffaloBills]

Today we salute you, guy who puts 220lbs 4.4 forty players at Defensive End.

You think Safeties can excel at playing on the line.

Have you ever thought about Run Stuffing?

Today we salute IncredibleDraftGuru

[jayceheathman]

got this idea off another board and found it hilarious...everyone write your own and keep em NFL related or specific team related.


"Today we salute you, Mr. Let's Pick Up Every FA Out There Suggester.

You take your years of playing Madden and bring that experience to the real world.
(I LOVE Franchise mode!)

Even our positions of strength aren't safe from your GM prowess.
(You can neverrrrrrr have enough depth)

Salary cap? Roster size limit? Those don't exist in the America you know.
(Vet minimum plus incentivvvvvvves)

So here's to you, Mr. Let's Pick Up Every FA Out There Suggester"

Today we salute you, Mr. Dead Guy Who Lost His Life to Measels but Still Haunts the Message Boards.

You take your thousands of posts and scare us into actually thinking you are dead
(We missed you so much)

Even all the man love you have got from this site wasnt enough to keep you alive.
(We thought we would have to get a girlfriend)

Football? Man Crushes? Who needs those when you can fake your death while having the measels?
(Your ghost is better than nothing)

So here's to you, Mr. Dead Guy Who Lost His Life to Measels but Still Haunts the Message Boards.

[MichaelJordanEberle (sabf)]

Today we salute you, Mr. Dead Guy Who Lost His Life to Measels but Still Haunts the Message Boards.

You take your thousands of posts and scare us into actually thinking you are dead
(We missed you so much)

Even all the man love you have got from this site wasnt enough to keep you alive.
(We thought we would have to get a girlfriend)

Football? Man Crushes? Who needs those when you can fake your death while having the measels?
(Your ghost is better than nothing)

So here's to you, Mr. Dead Guy Who Lost His Life to Measels but Still Haunts the Message Boards.

Today we salute you, useless troll who throws in opinions on prospects just to create a reaction.

You take the highest rated, and explain how they are no better than pop warner benchwarmers.
(Chris Wells can't break tackles, it's true)

With your sleepers, you tout them as the elites, their greatness shall know no bound.
(Freeman>Brady)

You selflessly dedicate your time to the busting of myths that the media creates.
(Turn that draft board upside down!)

So here's to you, arbitrary Draft Countdown troll.

[bhaarat316]

Today we salute you, useless troll who throws in opinions on prospects just to create a reaction.

You take the highest rated, and explain how they are no better than pop warner benchwarmers.
(Chris Wells can't break tackles, it's true)

With your sleepers, you tout them as the elites, their greatness shall know no bound.
(Freeman>Brady)

You selflessly dedicate your time to the busting of myths that the media creates.
(Turn that draft board upside down!)

So here's to you, arbitrary Draft Countdown troll.


AHhaha You should have thrown mind Bottling in there somewhere.

[Dirty Thirty]

Heres to you Mr. Wears an Ex Players Jersey to the Game Guy.

Like the true fan that you are, you represent your colors wearing that jersey even if its 2 sizes too small and its been 4 years since he's played for your team.
(My other jerseys in the waaash)

NFL Shop? Not for you oh king of the semi-throwback. You want to remind fans of that super bowl winning quarterback. Even if he won it with another team.
(Shuttt up. My jerseys awwwwwwwesome!)

So crack open a Bud Light Mr. Saluter of What Could Have Been, your boldness has earned it.

[Bruce Banner]

Root for the logo, not the individual.

[Hawk]

Here's to you Mr. Think You Know Football Guy.

You bask in your own self confidence while educating your unknowing friends about how great Steven Jackson was while at USC. (He should've started over Bush)

Tim Tebow? He would have been so much better had he went to the school he initially signed with--Michigan. (Maybe even win the Heisman).

So bust open a cold bottle of Bud Light, Mr. Think You Know Football Guy, your ignorance should not go unrewarded.

[Gay Ork Wang]

Here's to you Mr. If u i get neg repped people definitely hate me.

You go around and talk crap. you receive neg rep. Doesn't mean we hate you personally.

Your opinion is wrong. Your facts are useless and out of proportion. That's why we neg rep you. We dont know you so we cant hate you

So here's to you, Mr. Neg Rep equals Personal Insult although my statement is ****.

[SuperKevin]

Here's to you Mr. If u i get neg repped people definitely hate me.

You go around and talk crap. you receive neg rep. Doesn't mean we hate you personally.

Your opinion is wrong. Your facts are useless and out of proportion. That's why we neg rep you. We dont know you so we cant hate you

So here's to you, Mr. Neg Rep equals Personal Insult although my statement is ****.

I should neg rep you for such an awful attempt

[Michigan]

Today we salute you, Mr. Former Packers Great.

You put dreams in the minds of young Packers fans everywhere, and then threw them away like an overtime NFC Championship Game INT.
(I thought Driver was open)

You made your team wait on your retirement in back, to back, to back years.
(Why did we draft Rodgers?)

You are now a Jet, fitting for the way you're flying away from any relationships you still have with the Packers.
(Is Millen on the line?)

So crack open an ice-cold Bud Light Mr. Former Packers Great, because this is one Pack you can commit to.

[Jimmy]

(Drums) Today We Salute You Mr. Couch quarterback who thinks he's Bill Belichick. (Real men of geniusssssssss)

Head coach of your team make a questionable decision? You make sure everyone in the room knows what you would have called
(Damn straaaight the double reverse to Leftwich would have workeddd)

Run on third and twenty six, with ten seconds left in the first half? No, You're not having any of that.
(We should have run play actionnnnn)

Draw plays? Slant Patterns? A mere childs' game. You would stick your team's rookie speedster at quarterback.
(I swear, he played quarterback in high school)

So bust open a cold bottle of Bud Light, Mr. Guy who thinks he's Bill Belichick. (I'm telling you, a QB Screen would be perfect right now)

[MetSox17]

Wow, why'd you get warned?

[SuperKevin]

Wow, why'd you get warned?

Sig is too large

[Bruce Banner]

Wow, why'd you get warned?

sig/avatar violation.

you can click on the infraction thingy and it tells you

[MetSox17]

Sig is too large

Oh lol. I thought it was for the post. How would this change under your regime, SK?

[the_legend_killer]

Today we salute you, Mr. Overestimates His Team's Chances Homer Guy
(Mr. Overestimates his team's chances homer guy!)

It's only preseason, but you're already talking Super Bowl, even though you're team hasn't been to the playoffs since 1988
(We're coming for the Lombardi!)

You're starting QB has had three knee surgeries, two leagues suspensions and four new coaches in the last 6 years? Sounds like a winner to me
(He's still an 86 on Madden!)

Every year you say this is your year, even though you can't name three of your starters on defense
(Youth MOVEment!)

So bust open a Bud Light, Mr. Overestimater of the odds, because no matter how cold your team is, we've got something that's always colder.
(Mr. Overestimates his teams chances homer guy.........)

[CJSchneider]

Best advice I ever took, don't take yourself too seriously.
That being said, here goes-

Today we salute you, Mr. situational blitzing quarterback.

With your knowledge of the offensive scheme you could rack up sacks left and right
(20 per game I'm guessing!)

Like a hurricane, you twist your way through, to the opposition as he bootlegs to the left
(You knew what he was thinking)

And should this fail, you are always ready to contribute to your team no matter what is asked.
(Add 30 pounds and switch positions)

So bust open a Bud Light, Mr. Situational blitzing quarterback, because bythe end of the game, alcohol may be your only excuse.

[TheBuffaloBills]

Today we salute you, Mr. throw the Challenge flag after every other play.

You scream at the head coach to throw the Red flag after an unfair penalty
(Cant Challenge Penalties)

You still want the flag to be thrown even though it will CLEARLY be overturned
(Overtuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurned)

You always want to challenge a fumble that was ruled a dead ball
(Cant challenge those plays)

You scream at the head coach and say Throw the flag when he has already used it twice in the game

(Cant throw it 3 times)

Cheers to you, Mr. throw the Challenge flag after every other plaaaaaaaaaaay.