PDA

View Full Version : Need Ways to Destroy a Textbook


Shane P. Hallam
04-01-2011, 02:27 PM
One of my theater kids (senior,) history class struggled through the first semester, so I promised him if he gets an A for the second semester, him and I would take one the textbooks and destroy it in as many ways possible after he graduates (we are getting rid of them anyway, but he doesn't know that). Well, he did it for the 3rd quarter, so I better start planning. I want multiple ways to destroy the textbook without completely destroying it (if that makes sense). Basically, many many ways to damage it (run it over with a car, etc,) and then one final bang to destroy it! I come to SWDC for these type of conundrums of course.

ryno626
04-01-2011, 02:34 PM
shoot it with a potato gun

Rabscuttle
04-01-2011, 05:50 PM
Let the state of Texas edit it.

MidwayMonster31
04-01-2011, 05:55 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VvR_3OTxs8A
Go to 8:32

brasho
04-01-2011, 06:22 PM
Washing machine and dryer should make it nice and nearly destroyed. See if your home ec teacher will let you use her machines, though I'm not sure she would... it might be really noisy, but should be effective. Other options, cement mixer, blow torch, used as link in a game of red rover, frisbee it off the roof, shooting range (off campus of course), put it in the kiln in the fine arts department, and last but not least-allow Ryan Mallet to handle it-he's an expert in destroying things (look at his draft stock).

nikkayeah
04-01-2011, 07:02 PM
bang bang bang

bored of education
04-01-2011, 07:09 PM
1. Burn
2. Eat
3. Bury in a forest
4. run over with lawnmower

thule
04-01-2011, 07:32 PM
This feels too perfect...came across this a week ago. The fun starts at 2:45 in the video

K3FqG7yXEUs

Awesome

jrdrylie
04-01-2011, 09:10 PM
Molotov Cocktail. And then as it is burning, shoot it with a gun. Put out the fire in whatever manner you feel appropriate. To finish it off, drop it in a vat of liquid nitrogen to freeze it and then throw it against a wall, causing it to shatter in a million pieces. That should do the trick.

descendency
04-01-2011, 09:17 PM
edit: not completely destroying it is for pansies. I lit a physics book on fire after I passed it. Burned quite fast (especially with Lighter Fluid all over it lol)

Thermite (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rdCsbZf1_Ng). Definitely thermite.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lAl28d6tbko

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jIikjdkgT6U

NotRickJames
04-01-2011, 09:37 PM
Dig a hole and piss on it, a la Cheats.

CJSchneider
04-01-2011, 10:00 PM
Any method that does not utilize a large amount of explosives will just be a let down.

Brothgar
04-01-2011, 10:55 PM
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_2R7KGeDSKQg/TJ6KKBGzuxI/AAAAAAAAAHs/AEoem_y3wWM/s640/kill-it-with-fire-demotivational-poster-1235695993.jpg

Brothgar
04-01-2011, 10:59 PM
Well we don't want to destroy it all at once.

1. Throw rocks (slingshot) at it everyone can join it will be fun.
2. Rip a few pages into confetti.
3. bury confetti
4. Start bonfire with it.

Shane P. Hallam
04-01-2011, 11:27 PM
Exactly, I want multiple ways of damaging it, and then one big way of ultimately destroying it.

the dude
04-02-2011, 07:07 AM
let dog eat it

burn poo

diabsoule
04-02-2011, 09:56 AM
http://www.untoldentertainment.com/blog/img/2009_01_08/bonfire.jpg

Textbook bonfire!

PackerLegend
04-02-2011, 10:41 AM
8RbL4PwTDsQ

Find 1.... Now!

Brothgar
04-02-2011, 12:10 PM
If it wasn't a student and/or you weren't a teacher i would have the most epic way of doing so.

1. Have a stripper grind it.
2. Shoot it with a gun
3. burn it
4. piss on the ashes.
5. bury the ashes
6. rent hookers and have sex on the burial site.
7. ???
8. Profit

of course ample beer must be provided.

CJSchneider
04-02-2011, 06:49 PM
If it will crush a car, it can crush a book.

zWbhk1NxeME

nepg
04-02-2011, 07:29 PM
You should fap on it in front of your students.

The_Dude
04-02-2011, 07:40 PM
The guy next door to me, who teaches 19th Century history, fires off a cannon a few times a year. He only uses powder, but a fully loaded cannon would be an awesome way to destroy school property.... especially a History book!

nepg
04-02-2011, 09:07 PM
The guy next door to me, who teaches 19th Century history, fires off a cannon a few times a year. He only uses powder, but a fully loaded cannon would be an awesome way to destroy school property.... especially a History book!

Perfect. While blasting this:

6PI2vFboHNA

CJSchneider
04-02-2011, 10:52 PM
You should fap on it in front of your students.

OK, but then what will his class do for the next 6 hours and 59 minutes.

CJSchneider
04-02-2011, 10:55 PM
Perfect. While blasting this:

6PI2vFboHNA

Tchaikovsky would be better.

Brothgar
04-03-2011, 12:42 AM
Tchaikovsky would be better.
agreed
vGPd3Bh66rw
The Flight of the Valkaries is the only way to go here.

let all othermusic be damned.

nepg
04-03-2011, 03:19 AM
OK, but then what will his class do for the next 6 hours and 59 minutes.

Lick it up.

CJSchneider
04-03-2011, 10:19 AM
http://www.dirtybutton.com/media/db571-shocked-monkey.jpg

The_Dude
04-03-2011, 10:25 AM
OK, but then what will his class do for the next 6 hours and 59 minutes.

Who the hell teaches a class for 7 hours?!?!?!?

Shane P. Hallam
04-11-2011, 07:17 AM
Who the hell teaches a class for 7 hours?!?!?!?

I do! Anyone else?

CaneBang
04-11-2011, 09:40 AM
poop on it

the_legend_killer
04-11-2011, 09:48 AM
poop on it

Yep. Feces is the way to go.

CJSchneider
04-11-2011, 12:18 PM
I do! Anyone else?

My planning hour is the last hour of the day, so I am teaching 7:30 - 1:40 minus a 25 minute lunch from 12:15 - 12:40.

The_Dude
04-11-2011, 07:00 PM
lame-o. The guy next door to me, same one who shoots the cannon, teaches 7 out of 7 periods every other day. The other day he teaches 5 out of 7. I am expecting him to have an aneurysm before the end of the school year. Either that or he'll shoot a kid with his cannon.

CJSchneider
04-11-2011, 07:13 PM
lame-o. The guy next door to me, same one who shoots the cannon, teaches 7 out of 7 periods every other day. The other day he teaches 5 out of 7. I am expecting him to have an aneurysm before the end of the school year. Either that or he'll shoot a kid with his cannon.

I did that a few years ago. I can assure you it is a *****.

Also, I am sad none of the several teachers came up with this idea.

If you want to kill a good text book - submit it for evaluation to the district text book selection committee. It will die a most gruesome death.

RealityCheck
04-11-2011, 07:18 PM
My textbooks usually get destroyed during the school year so I can't help here :)

descendency
04-11-2011, 07:38 PM
Play Extreme Frisbee with it.

Brothgar
04-11-2011, 08:32 PM
Add multiple stabbings to my list of ideas.

The_Dude
04-11-2011, 09:03 PM
I did that a few years ago. I can assure you it is a *****.

Also, I am sad none of the several teachers came up with this idea.

If you want to kill a good text book - submit it for evaluation to the district text book selection committee. It will die a most gruesome death.

Ugh, I start this process the year after next. Add in the fact that MN is creating new (grade specific, ugh) Social Studies standards (& i will have to switch grade levels), and we are talking about a major headache.

Whatevs.... only 37 school days until Summer Break.... & then summer school. Dammit!!!!!! Why do i hate myself?!?!?!?

descendency
04-11-2011, 09:15 PM
Take it into a bathroom and Ben Roethlisberger it. Don't forget to claim you are getting married a few weeks later.