Prowler's Advice Thread

[Prowler]

Come inside, take your shirt off, and I'll help ease some of your troubles. I'll try and keep this as clean as I can.

*Warning, my advice may land you in jail or lead you to HPV and genital warts.

[kalbears13]

YES! Someone needs to ask something dammit.

[Punisher]

*Warning, my advice may land you in jail or lead you to HPV and genital warts.

Any chance you can do the opposite?


...of all 3

[Prowler]

Any chance you can do the opposite?


...of all 3

I can tailor my advice to my clients' needs. I can provide Good, Neutral, and Bad with branches of lawful or chaotic on each. Besides, a lot of people go to jail, HPV is practically nothing, and warts fade. However, your awesome memories of events will never go away.

[The_Dude]

What can you do for Super Packer's itchy asshole? Apparently that thread closed before you got a chance to contribute.

I did get my new sig quote from it though. Sorry, CJ.

[CJSchneider]

He must have thought I was Brodeur or something.

[MichaelJordanEberle (sabf)]

If my girlfriend has a *****, does that make me ***?

[Borat]

When Tebow is "Tebowing," isn't he just praying to himself?

[MetSox17]

When Tebow is "Tebowing," isn't he just praying to himself?

That pompous asshole.

[Brent]

What is essential, Prowler, to having a dope house party?

[Borat]

I'm not prowler, but I'd guess you'd need a house and a lot of dope.

[Brent]

I'm not prowler, but I'd guess you'd need a house and a lot of dope.
dope is a slang adjective, you old bastard.

[Prowler]

What can you do for Super Packer's itchy asshole?

I did miss it, but I would recommend lots of butt sex, because its probably just his body's way of communicating that it wants more.

If my girlfriend has a *****, does that make me ***?

As long as she can pose as a girl then you're good. And maybe depending on how well the boob job went. However, most trannies that I know have athletic rears to help compensate. Its normally pretty awesome because a chick with a ***** is probably willing to do anything you want. As for the question, I would say that its definitely not ***. I just think of it as a girlfriend with different options.

When Tebow is "Tebowing," isn't he just praying to himself?

I believe that he is a false god and a potential antichrist. He was sent here to draw attention away from the true god, the Sun. The Sun is what should be worshiped. That asshole needs to hold his arms up in the form of a circle and give true praise where praise is due. Without the Sun we'd all be freaking cold. I believe that Tebowing is just him siphoning power from his dark under-realm to recharge himself after his terrible dark magic displays.

[CJSchneider]

You spelled "Son" wrong.

[Borat]

dope is a slang adjective, you old bastard.

I ain't old son. I'm hip to the jive, ya dig?

[Prowler]

What is essential, Prowler, to having a dope house party?

Essentials for a dope house party:

1. Location. It either needs to be near the country, or directly in the middle of a part of town where people are too scared to call the cops about anything.

2. Women. Who else is going to clean up the puke and do the dishes afterwards?

3. 90s Music. I want to hear nothing later than 90s music. Let all the little ******* kids squirm when they don't know what the hell the songs are. This also helps you impress the underage women that will most likely be attending your party.

4. Recruit a few high school kids to help. Hook them while they are young so that you can have buddies to replace the ones that will likely be killed during your parties.

5. Gun control. Make sure that you control the automatics and shotguns. Other people may bring handguns, but you have to stay in control of the situation.

6. Substances...lots of substances.

7. Horny dogs. Literally. Their humping will help set the mood for the women at the party.

8. A yard for people to piss on. Nobody likes bathrooms anymore.

9. Fire. Bonfire, torches, anything with a flame.

10. Swimming pool filled with ________. Jello, Kool Aid, beer, water, whatever. Its just a stage that gives hoes a chance to be hoes.