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  • #46
    Under or around??



    <+fenikz> "**** the Police, ride my fischstache bitches"

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    • #47
      Originally posted by 7-11 View Post
      How would you know loser? Come and talk to us when youve had one
      Oh hey, thanks for being such a nice guy ASSHOLE!

      sig by Nyi28nhl from Islander Mania

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      • #48
        Originally posted by CalBears99 View Post
        Oh hey, thanks for being such a nice guy ASSHOLE!
        Is someone talking? i believe this is a no-wiper only area

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        • #49
          I do most things sitting.

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          • #50
            Originally posted by CalBears99 View Post
            Oh hey, thanks for being such a nice guy ASSHOLE!
            Dixon got hurt..............

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            • #51
              Originally posted by KILLERSANTA View Post
              Dixon got hurt..............
              I'm pretty sure if Dennis Dixon wiped the wrong way, he could break an arm

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              • #52
                Standing.

                Although when I saw the title, I thought it was sitting or standing when you're pretty sure it's just a #1. I sit when I'm at home, just to make myself comfortable, but stand anywhere else.

                Okay, I know that's TMI, so I will GTFO, OK?

                Xbox Live Gamertag: DocSteel92
                Rest in peace, Randy Pausch.

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                • #53
                  Originally posted by Steelers4Life View Post
                  Standing.

                  Although when I saw the title, I thought it was sitting or standing when you're pretty sure it's just a #1. I sit when I'm at home, just to make myself comfortable, but stand anywhere else.

                  Okay, I know that's TMI, so I will GTFO, OK?
                  Do you have a vagina?

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                  • #54
                    Standing when younger, now converted to sitting.

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                    • #55
                      Standing. I need visual evidence I got the remains off.

                      Paul

                      New York Giants
                      New York Yankees
                      New York Knicks (unfortunately)
                      UConn Basketball
                      Virginia Tech Football
                      UConn Football

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                      • #56
                        This thread is giving me deja-vu. Didn't we do this already.

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                        • #57
                          Originally posted by NYGibril28 View Post
                          Standing. I need visual evidence I got the remains off.
                          Very true. I admire my work.
                          Penn State University - Detroit Red Wings - New York Jets - Red Bull New York - Fulham FC

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                          • #58
                            ESCAPEE.
                            Definition: a fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or forcing a poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of panic embarrassment. This is similar to the hot flash you receive when passing an unseen police car and speeding. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen. If you are standing next to the farter in the urinal, pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee, it is uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy.

                            JAILBREAK (Used in conjunction with ESCAPEE).
                            Definition: When forcing poop, several farts slip out at a machine gun pace. This is usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this should happen, do not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom so to spare everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.

                            COURTESY FLUSH.
                            Definition: The act of flushing the toilet the instant the nose cone of the poop log hits the water and the poop is whisked away to an undisclosed location. This reduces the amount of air time the poop has to stink up the bathroom. This can help you avoid being caught doing the WALK OF SHAME.

                            WALK OF SHAME.
                            Definition: Walking from the stall, to the sink, to the door after you have just stunk up the bathroom. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if someone walks in and busts you. As with all farts, it is best to pretend that the smell does not exist. Can be avoided with the use of the COURTESY FLUSH.

                            OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER.
                            Definition: A colleague who poops at work and damn proud of it. You will often see an Out Of The Closet Pooper enter the bathroom with a newspaper or magazine under their arm. Always look around the office for the Out Of The Closet Pooper before entering the bathroom.

                            THE POOPING FRIENDS NETWORK (PFN).
                            Definition: A group of coworkers who band together to ensure emergency pooping goes off without incident. This group can help you to monitor the whereabouts of Out Of The Closet Poopers, and identify SAFE HAVENS.

                            SAFE HAVENS.
                            Definition: A seldom used bathroom somewhere in the building where you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the opposite sex. This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex entering the bathroom.

                            TURD BURGLAR:
                            Definition: A pooper who does not realize that you are in the stall and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments that can occur when taking a dump at work. If this occurs, remain in the stall until the Turd Burglar leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact.

                            CAMO-COUGH.
                            Definition: A phony cough that alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you are in a stall. This can be used to cover-up a WATERMELON, or to alert potential Turd Burglars. Very effective when used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE.

                            ASTAIRE.
                            Definition: A subtle toe-tap that is used to alert potential Turd Burglars that you are occupying a stall. This will remove all doubt that the stall is occupied. If you hear an Astaire, leave the bathroom immediately so the pooper can poop in peace.

                            WATERMELON.
                            Definition: A turd that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet water. This is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a Watermelon coming on, create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH.

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                            • #59
                              In regards to the person who brought up the peeing standing or sitting, the only time I take a piss sitting down is early in the morning when I am still half asleep...

                              ^Thanks to Eaglez.Fan for the sweet sig!

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                              • #60
                                haha Me too. Sometimes it's too dark to see the potty and you dont want to turn the lights on because it will blind you. I tried standing up once and later found out I missed badly.

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