Relationship Advice Thread - Page 325

jrdrylie · 05-06-2012, 12:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RaiderNation

Alright guys this has been on my mind and I want to see how people think of this. I just started dating this girl who I've been hanging out with for the past couple months, but the thing is she has a sister who my brother has already had 2 kids with and are currently back together after a break. Do some people see this as weird or anything that we together? We are both still just 19 and have both said we want to to take our time with each other, and I honestly haven't liked a girl as much as I do with her.

No, that isn't weird. I know a couple of brothers who have ender up maryying sisters. In fact, I knew a pair of twins who married another set of twins. That was a bit weird because I couldnt tell them apart. But honestly, as long as you aren't related, nothing is weird.

nobodyinparticular · 05-06-2012, 01:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RaiderNation

Alright guys this has been on my mind and I want to see how people think of this. I just started dating this girl who I've been hanging out with for the past couple months, but the thing is she has a sister who my brother has already had 2 kids with and are currently back together after a break. Do some people see this as weird or anything that we together? We are both still just 19 and have both said we want to to take our time with each other, and I honestly haven't liked a girl as much as I do with her.

Of course people will think it's weird. There are people who think everything is weird. Working in a job where I deal with hundreds of people face-to-face daily, everyone will have an opinion.

Would I be concerned about something like dating your sister-in-law's (kinda) sister? Nope.

eaglesalltheway · 05-07-2012, 10:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RaiderNation

Alright guys this has been on my mind and I want to see how people think of this. I just started dating this girl who I've been hanging out with for the past couple months, but the thing is she has a sister who my brother has already had 2 kids with and are currently back together after a break. Do some people see this as weird or anything that we together? We are both still just 19 and have both said we want to to take our time with each other, and I honestly haven't liked a girl as much as I do with her.

Everything checks out for me, lol. Only thing I would say is watch that things don't become "a contest". Two sets of siblings together, things like that are bound to happen anyway (sisters talk, all the time, you know it), just try to keep that down as much as possible.

StickSkills · 05-09-2012, 10:55 PM

There was a guy in my head tonight going:

The Alex · 05-10-2012, 12:14 AM

I didn't know this thread existed until just now. 300 pages of relationship advice? Come on people. I can answer every single problem you face with one comprehensive video.

Lock the thread. This is all you're ever going to need.

someone447 · 05-10-2012, 06:03 PM

Not looking for any advice. I've got plenty of it from my friends and finally decided to listen to all of them.

I met this girl in college 5 years, we had a fling and then we each moved. Her to Alaska, me to Wisconsin. We lost touch for about 6 months, then we started talking again. Some of you old-timers might remember when I went hitch hiking--she was the girl who was going to go with me. Then 2 years later she asked me to move to San Diego when I graduated. I figured we would just be friends--that lasted all of 6 hours after I got there. We dated for a while and decided to take an indefinite rock climbing trip starting in December; but first we decided to visit our families. She went Alaska, and I went to Wisconsin yet again. She called and told me that she couldn't do the trip with me, she had to do it alone. It was for legitimate reasons that I had absolutely no problem with. However, she wanted me to meet her in Joshua Tree and climb for a few weeks in the beginning of the trip. I did. A few weeks turned into 3 months. She broke up with me at the end of March--for the same reasons she told me earlier. I left later that night on my own trip.

She has been texting me every couple of days. Two weeks ago, I told her I needed a month to try to figure out where I stood in regards to us. Two days ago she texted me again. Then again the next day. So last night I told her we could have no farther contact because we have never been just friends and I will never be able to be just friends with her. But in all honesty, we would never be able to be just friends with each other. It would be all too easy for us to make a mistake while we are dating someone else. It isn't a position I am willing to put myself in.

So after I told her we could have no more contact, she got incredibly pissed. She got even more upset when I pointed out she was the one who broke up with me, and therefore had no right to be upset when I didn't want to talk to her anymore.

Apparently, she is "not going to bother me ever again."

On the plus side, she introduced and taught me how to rock climb. Now I'm living out of my car climbing 5 days a week all over the west coast of the US. So I guess there isn't anything for me to be upset about.

I just felt the need to vent anonymously.

Brent · 05-10-2012, 08:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by someone447

I just felt the need to vent anonymously.

Honestly, I had been wondering what the hell happened to you.

RCAChainGang · 05-10-2012, 08:45 PM

Hey I wrote up a post about a girl a while ago, but I'll just jump into it rather than try to sum things up from the previous post.

I'm in more of a reflective state because the whole thing is over. This girl "wasn't ready for a relationship" so I told her we could be friends and I was going to do my best to move on. Well, she saw that she didn't get nearly as much attention as she used to from me so she flirted with me a lot. It was really hard, but I was able to keep myself from getting roped in. Finally, she tells me that she can see me moving on and if I'm still open she wants to date me because she really likes me.

I told her to think, sleep, and pray about it and we would talk about it. She got back to me and said she wanted to pursue dating. So we went out to eat after a play I was in. Things went well and conversation was good. We held hands and that's as far as it went for the night because we met up with some friends afterwards.

I am a theatre major so I have a lot of [EDIT: homosexual] friends and she was cuddling and talking to them a lot. She just didn't act at all how she did before we were dating. I was really pissed off, but I was able to keep my emotions in check.

Finally I had enough. I told her we needed to talk and it would take merely 15 minutes cause she was really good at flaking. In that 15 minute conversation she said "I'm not ready for a relationship" and "I liked the idea of you rather than you." I asked her if she ever could see herself being ready for a relationship with me and she said no.

I guess I just wonder what I could have possibly done wrong in one date. All of her friends said that I did everything right and they were kinda mad at her for doing this to me. I know it is hard for you guys to critique something I didn't summarize very well, but I guess I'm just wondering about better dating methods. I don't want to make a girl uncomfortable, but I want to be a leader in a relationship. It is just all really hard because she was so immature about everything. I'm merely finishing my freshman year in college so I have plenty of time. I'm just kinda left in this wake feeling like absolute crap. It was really a shot to my confidence. Thanks guys and I appreciate any advice for getting over her and having successful relationships in the future.

Raiderz4Life · 05-10-2012, 08:52 PM

Sometimes it just doesn't roll your way. Just because it didn't work out doesn't necessarily mean you're doing something wrong.

From the sounds of it she's just an attention *****. If everything went fine on the actual date then it was probably fine. I'm sure its universal with all girls but if a date is going sour they'll let you know in one way or another.

Ness · 05-10-2012, 08:55 PM

Based on what you said, it seems that the girl isn't the right one for you. Best to move on and forget about her. At least in terms of dating. There are plenty of girls everywhere that are pretty and actually worth the trouble of pursuing, assuming that they are single.

njx9 · 05-10-2012, 08:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by raiderz4life

From the sounds of it she's just an attention *****.

this. the second they pull that ****, run. good relationships don't come from emotional abuse. good sex on the other hand...

Bulldogs · 05-10-2012, 09:07 PM

RCAChainGang · 05-10-2012, 09:27 PM

Interestingly enough I'm going to 6 flags with a group of people this summer and she will be there.

Raiderz4Life · 05-10-2012, 10:14 PM

Treat her with indifference as best you can. Shower who da man!!

StickSkills · 05-10-2012, 10:25 PM

Is there a certain # of dates that you should go on before asking to make it official with a girl or any rule like that that I dont know about?

There's back story to this girl, but I'm too lazy to type it out.

thefalconer · 05-10-2012, 11:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StickSkills

Is there a certain # of dates that you should go on before asking to make it official with a girl or any rule like that that I dont know about?

There's back story to this girl, but I'm too lazy to type it out.

go with your gut and be confident with it. don't do rules.

Ness · 05-11-2012, 01:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RCAChainGang

Interestingly enough I'm going to 6 flags with a group of people this summer and she will be there.

That's fine. Just act normal.

nobodyinparticular · 05-11-2012, 02:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eaglesalltheway

Everything checks out for me, lol. Only thing I would say is watch that things don't become "a contest". Two sets of siblings together, things like that are bound to happen anyway (sisters talk, all the time, you know it), just try to keep that down as much as possible.

Well as long as he has a bigger schlong than his brother, then he doesn't have to worry about family contests and sisters talking. He can walk around with his head held high.

someone447 · 05-11-2012, 02:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brent

Honestly, I had been wondering what the hell happened to you.

I haven't had regular access to the internet in almost 6 months. I pop up and post once in a while, it isn't very often though.

Prowler · 05-11-2012, 03:37 PM

pics of girl i'm going after

I'm kind of being a piece of **** homewrecker. However, the dude has been with her 5 years+, ignored her, never told her he loved her for years, never touched her for years, video game playing douchebag, etc.

I'm in love with her and have been in the process of stealing her for a couple months now. She wasn't looking for anyone and frankly wasn't ready to leave her boyfriend. She did leave him a couple months ago for me, but got scared because I didn't have my own place and she was stuck in a hotel and we had only been seeing each other for a couple weeks. I have my own place now, but she's scared and I've been dating her for a couple months. She loves me and I feel like we're right on the edge of finally being together completely. I need her to jump. However, I've been patiently waiting and trying to earn her trust every day. I haven't been a whiny *****, I've persistently loved her more everyday and have done everything I could to be the best person I can be. I think I've earned her trust and her love. I'm hoping she'll be ready to leave him and move in with me pretty soon. I know she isn't playing me, I can feel it. Its just that she had assumed that she'd be with him forever and have a family etc with him, so she's making sure that I'm not completely full of ****.

I don't really need advice, I just wanted to share with someone. She's not a ho, she is a good person and I've felt bad for pushing myself into her life. I literally woke up one day and realized that I didn't want be without her anymore. I think I'm best for her and I think she realizes it. And yes, it does piss me off every second that she's with him. She told me that she doesn't sleep with him and based on how often he calls to check up on her I believe it. I also kind of have an agreement that its not in anyone's best interest if I go beat some sense into him.

I feel the magic. Every other girl was just the result of my own pride or selfishness. This one I don't have any questions about, I know that she's the one.

SuperPacker · 05-11-2012, 03:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Prowler

I'm kind of being a piece of **** homewrecker. However, the dude has been with her 5 years+, ignored her, never told her he loved her for years, never touched her for years, video game playing douchebag, etc.

MOTH would be proud of you!

Ness · 05-11-2012, 03:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Prowler

pics of girl i'm going after

I'm kind of being a piece of **** homewrecker. However, the dude has been with her 5 years+, ignored her, never told her he loved her for years, never touched her for years, video game playing douchebag, etc.

I'm in love with her and have been in the process of stealing her for a couple months now. She wasn't looking for anyone and frankly wasn't ready to leave her boyfriend. She did leave him a couple months ago for me, but got scared because I didn't have my own place and she was stuck in a hotel and we had only been seeing each other for a couple weeks. I have my own place now, but she's scared and I've been dating her for a couple months. She loves me and I feel like we're right on the edge of finally being together completely. I need her to jump. However, I've been patiently waiting and trying to earn her trust every day. I haven't been a whiny *****, I've persistently loved her more everyday and have done everything I could to be the best person I can be. I think I've earned her trust and her love. I'm hoping she'll be ready to leave him and move in with me pretty soon. I know she isn't playing me, I can feel it. Its just that she had assumed that she'd be with him forever and have a family etc with him, so she's making sure that I'm not completely full of ****.

I don't really need advice, I just wanted to share with someone. She's not a ho, she is a good person and I've felt bad for pushing myself into her life. I literally woke up one day and realized that I didn't want be without her anymore. I think I'm best for her and I think she realizes it. And yes, it does piss me off every second that she's with him. She told me that she doesn't sleep with him and based on how often he calls to check up on her I believe it. I also kind of have an agreement that its not in anyone's best interest if I go beat some sense into him.

I feel the magic. Every other girl was just the result of my own pride or selfishness. This one I don't have any questions about, I know that she's the one.

You are really tossing the word love around.

Just out of curiosity, how old are you guys again?

Raiderz4Life · 05-11-2012, 03:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SuperPacker

MOTH would be proud of you!

Yea this made me laugh

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ness

You are really tossing the word love around.

Just out of curiosity, how old are you guys again?

I also noticed this.

Prowler · 05-11-2012, 03:51 PM

I'm 27 and she's 26. We've both been burned and through the circus of entering into a serious relationship when we were 19. I've known of her for 2 years and have been close to her for 7 months, have wanted her and felt an attraction for 5 months, and dating for almost 3 months now.

Plus, out personalities seem to match perfectly. I can be sensitive or tough without being an asshole, and she is loving and fun without being a sl*t. Our interests align and we're diverse enough to never be bored together.

njx9 · 05-11-2012, 03:58 PM

wtf. she's 26 and playing games? ...