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Old 06-26-2012, 06:06 AM    (permalink
Brent
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Originally Posted by 49ersfan_87 View Post
One of my close friends is annoying me. Cliffs

-Meets girl, falls in "love" (respect his feelings still)
-Basically in friendzone with girl, she tells him everything/relationship issues
-Asks her out 3 months ago, says no, not wild enough, but kind of leads him on by saying he's caring and thats the kind of guy she wants to marry
-This gives him hope, and to this day he still feel he has a shot with her (and wants to marry her)

I tried to tell him to get over her, ask him if he wanted to meet new girls, etc. But he refuses to look at new girls (at least in that way) in any setting..school, etc. After a month i realized he still felt that way so i stopped talking about it because what else is there to say?

I know that feel because i had a severe case of one-itis and fell hard for a different girl, even took me almost 2 months to get over the rejection (although i accepted she said no immediately, deluded myself a bit, then went back to accepting). And i thought i was in "love" with her too but now i don't even care about my crush in that way.

Anyways, i'm just kind of annoyed that he's likely going to be waiting around for her and probably missing out on other opportunities for 1 girl who may never give him that chance.
if a girl says that he is "not wild enough" that's ******* hysterical and she's probably a real POS.

is he not aware that a girl giving him attention doesn't mean she likes him?
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Old 06-26-2012, 03:32 PM    (permalink
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He doesn't get a lot of attention from girls and this girl gives him a lot so he still feels there's a shot. He wants to show her he's a "good guy" and can treat her well. I don't think that will work.

They hung out yesterday and she had a stressful day according to him (got in a fight with a lady on the bus, scraped her knee and had to go to the hospital, family members causing some stress) and so she went on to say she would never marry a brown guy, only a white guy (they're both brown) right in front of his face. Of course he helped her out this whole day by listening to her and going to the hospital, etc.

He says he's willing to wait a year or 2 and see if she changes her mind...i wished him luck but i have nothing else to advise him with because i don't see what else i can say.

Last edited by 49ersfan_87 : 06-26-2012 at 03:37 PM.
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Old 06-26-2012, 03:51 PM    (permalink
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doesn't he take the hint.

That bitchh be crazy as well
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Old 07-01-2012, 05:40 PM    (permalink
Brent
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So, how stupid was I last night? The girl who dumped me without warning back in early '08 and I ran into each other in Austin last night and then had sex later. I feel like that was a poor choice.
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Old 07-01-2012, 07:40 PM    (permalink
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Worked with girl in 08. She added on FB but not a lot of convo. She messaged me one time on FB in 09 and thats last time we talked.

Why talk to her now instead of then? Forgot about her for a while, she had a BF then broke up, and i've cut a lot of weight and fat since 08, so i feel more confident in my looks.

Thinking of messaging her on FB (don't have number) and go from there. I haven't seen her in person in years so i feel there's no risk/potential high reward. She also messaged me once out of the blue but that was in 09, and i never messaged her again.

Good idea? And if so, what should i open with? I feel like i can sustain a decent convo flow but i want a good/funny opener. If its going well i'll try to get her number and see where it goes, although i dunno if i should ask her on a date right away IF it's going well.
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Old 07-01-2012, 07:44 PM    (permalink
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No risk potential. Hit her up and ask her what she has been up to lately. Don't ask her on a date right away, just talk to her. Now.
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Old 07-01-2012, 09:21 PM    (permalink
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So, like I alluded to earlier, I'm pretty much dating this girl I work with. We're not official yet because she leaves for Ireland next week for a couple weeks and we decided it would be best to wait until she gets back to start dating and whatnot.

My conundrum is I just found out my great white buffalo has just become single and I really, really want to pursue that.

How do I pull this off guys? Should I even go for this? This could be a tricky situation.
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Old 07-01-2012, 09:23 PM    (permalink
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So, like I alluded to earlier, I'm pretty much dating this girl I work with. We're not official yet because she leaves for Ireland next week for a couple weeks and we decided it would be best to wait until she gets back to start dating and whatnot.

My conundrum is I just found out my great white buffalo has just become single and I really, really want to pursue that.

How do I pull this off guys? Should I even go for this? This could be a tricky situation.
Have you committed to bring monogamous with the headed-to-Ireland girl? If not, ask out the white buffalo; otherwise, be respectful.
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Old 07-01-2012, 09:27 PM    (permalink
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Have you committed to bring monogamous with the headed-to-Ireland girl? If not, ask out the white buffalo; otherwise, be respectful.
Good point. I'm probably just over thinking this.

I'm gonna take a shot at the GWB.
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Old 07-02-2012, 12:39 AM    (permalink
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No risk potential. Hit her up and ask her what she has been up to lately. Don't ask her on a date right away, just talk to her. Now.
Didn't send her a message today because i'm hungover and on 3 hours sleep. But tomorrow or the day after (prefer her to be online too).

Would the line "I've had a crush on you for years" work (it's applicable in this case)? I've never used it. Semi-seriously thinking of using it. And if i do use it, dunno whether to use it as an opener or if the convo is going well (or maybe not at all). Or i might just be simple.

Last edited by 49ersfan_87 : 07-02-2012 at 12:47 AM.
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Old 07-02-2012, 12:50 AM    (permalink
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Didn't send her a message today because i'm hungover and on 3 hours sleep. But tomorrow or the day after (prefer her to be online too).

Would the line "I've had a crush on you for years" work (it's applicable in this case)? I've never used it. Semi-seriously thinking of using it. And if i do use it, dunno whether to use it as an opener or if the convo is going well (or maybe not at all). Or i might just be simple.
Maybe if she brings something like that up first. Not something that I would really use to try and get with a chick.
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Old 07-02-2012, 12:54 AM    (permalink
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I feel like that was a poor choice.
I feel like you're wrong.
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Old 07-02-2012, 12:55 AM    (permalink
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Didn't send her a message today because i'm hungover and on 3 hours sleep. But tomorrow or the day after (prefer her to be online too).

Would the line "I've had a crush on you for years" work (it's applicable in this case)? I've never used it. Semi-seriously thinking of using it. And if i do use it, dunno whether to use it as an opener or if the convo is going well (or maybe not at all). Or i might just be simple.
I used the line and it failed but I'm not sure if it is a test case or not.
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Old 07-02-2012, 08:32 AM    (permalink
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I'm in a bit of an interesting predicament. There's this extremely hot chick who is pretty much my 3rd serious relationship but my first actual love. However, she just went back to her boyfriend a month ago. She says she loves me but just can't leave even though her bf sucks. I have about 3 other pretty decently hot chicks that I could bang instead. I think that by me banging these other 3 chicks that she will finally realize that she could lose me.

I already have 1 out of 3 down...this is going to be a fun week.
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Old 07-02-2012, 01:11 PM    (permalink
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I feel like you're wrong.
Well, I'd gladly start dating her again because it would be easy, but my friends would disown me.
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Old 07-02-2012, 01:16 PM    (permalink
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Didn't send her a message today because i'm hungover and on 3 hours sleep. But tomorrow or the day after (prefer her to be online too).

Would the line "I've had a crush on you for years" work (it's applicable in this case)? I've never used it. Semi-seriously thinking of using it. And if i do use it, dunno whether to use it as an opener or if the convo is going well (or maybe not at all). Or i might just be simple.
Do. Not. Open with that. Youll come off creepy.

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I'm in a bit of an interesting predicament. There's this extremely hot chick who is pretty much my 3rd serious relationship but my first actual love. However, she just went back to her boyfriend a month ago. She says she loves me but just can't leave even though her bf sucks. I have about 3 other pretty decently hot chicks that I could bang instead. I think that by me banging these other 3 chicks that she will finally realize that she could lose me.

I already have 1 out of 3 down...this is going to be a fun week.
Thats what 'we in the biz' like to call party time. Nothing to lose here, swing away.
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Old 07-02-2012, 01:17 PM    (permalink
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So, how stupid was I last night? The girl who dumped me without warning back in early '08 and I ran into each other in Austin last night and then had sex later. I feel like that was a poor choice.
Why is that bad again? Have you guys talked since? If no, no harm no foul.
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Old 07-02-2012, 02:03 PM    (permalink
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Why is that bad again? Have you guys talked since? If no, no harm no foul.
Let me preface with this: I am looking to move to Austin in the next 12 months (as in, any job I can get that pays okay) because all my friends now live in Austin and I am done with DFW. Odds are good because I'm about to teach GT/Pre-AP classes which, for someone entering their 3rd year in a district like the one I work in is, well, unheard of. So, I feel my teaching resume will be wonderful. With that in mind, you can see where my mind is going...

When I was 21 I was dumped by this girl after a year and a half of dating. We spoke a while back for the first time since she dumped me. The conversation was good, but in the time between her leaving me and now, she's obviously changed, and is clearly a better person. But, the problem is that, while I am a forgive-and-forget type, my friends who knew her when she dated me (5 years ago) do not like her. At all. In fact, my closest friend was actually upset with me that I would go off and hook up with her. Another friend was like, "seriously, are you stupid?" and whatnot.

I feel really stupid right now because my mind is all ****** up with emotions. I would gladly start seeing her again because our personalities are so well suited for one another. There is some weird chemistry in our conversing and etc., enough so that I cannot get past it. Yeah, I've moved on since she left me, but I don't know. I feel weird. She clearly was more into it than I was on Saturday. Hell, she's texted me a few times yesterday and today, and I can tell she is probably going through what I am.

She lives in Austin, for those that missed that part.
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Old 07-02-2012, 02:20 PM    (permalink
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Let me preface with this: I am looking to move to Austin in the next 12 months (as in, any job I can get that pays okay) because all my friends now live in Austin and I am done with DFW. Odds are good because I'm about to teach GT/Pre-AP classes which, for someone entering their 3rd year in a district like the one I work in is, well, unheard of. So, I feel my teaching resume will be wonderful. With that in mind, you can see where my mind is going...

When I was 21 I was dumped by this girl after a year and a half of dating. We spoke a while back for the first time since she dumped me. The conversation was good, but in the time between her leaving me and now, she's obviously changed, and is clearly a better person. But, the problem is that, while I am a forgive-and-forget type, my friends who knew her when she dated me (5 years ago) do not like her. At all. In fact, my closest friend was actually upset with me that I would go off and hook up with her. Another friend was like, "seriously, are you stupid?" and whatnot.

I feel really stupid right now because my mind is all ****** up with emotions. I would gladly start seeing her again because our personalities are so well suited for one another. There is some weird chemistry in our conversing and etc., enough so that I cannot get past it. Yeah, I've moved on since she left me, but I don't know. I feel weird. She clearly was more into it than I was on Saturday. Hell, she's texted me a few times yesterday and today, and I can tell she is probably going through what I am.

She lives in Austin, for those that missed that part.
If you like her and want to give her another chance then you need to take things slow and go for it. Im sure your friends/family are important to you but you can't not date her just bc what they say.
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Old 07-02-2012, 04:05 PM    (permalink
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Yeah Brent, i don't think your friends not liking her should be the deal breaker in whether you see someone or not. They should understand that you're in a difficult situation and that you feel pretty strongly about her. Whether it's the right move or not, eventually you'll see for yourself.

If it were me, i would definitely consider it but very defensively. Don't just fling yourself in it with your heart on your sleeve because you'd seriously be putting yourself at risk of a major disappointment. Just wait it out, and see what happens if/when you move to ATX.
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Old 07-03-2012, 12:20 AM    (permalink
Brent
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Originally Posted by MetSox17 View Post
Yeah Brent, i don't think your friends not liking her should be the deal breaker in whether you see someone or not. They should understand that you're in a difficult situation and that you feel pretty strongly about her. Whether it's the right move or not, eventually you'll see for yourself.

If it were me, i would definitely consider it but very defensively. Don't just fling yourself in it with your heart on your sleeve because you'd seriously be putting yourself at risk of a major disappointment. Just wait it out, and see what happens if/when you move to ATX.
So, I got the invite to a 4th of July party, and decided to get with her tomorrow. This is clearly not a good idea, but I cannot turn down the chance to get laid...
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Old 07-03-2012, 02:09 AM    (permalink
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You can cross that bridge when you get there. Enjoy yourself (and her) for now.
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Old 07-08-2012, 03:10 PM    (permalink
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Is there any to overcome insecurity without the help of medication?

For example, some times i'll look in the mirror and feel like a 7/10, 2 minutes later i feel like a 3/10. When i'm with friends i can crack jokes that have everyone laughing, then i maybe make 1 or 2 stupid comments all night and thats all i can think about. Cute girl looks at me in class and i feel like i can maybe chat with her during break, but when the break comes an hour later i feel like i'll be bothering her, even though in this case she was alone and doing nothing.

Insecurity, feelsbadman.jpg
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Old 07-08-2012, 04:35 PM    (permalink
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Originally Posted by 49ersfan_87 View Post
Is there any to overcome insecurity without the help of medication?

For example, some times i'll look in the mirror and feel like a 7/10, 2 minutes later i feel like a 3/10. When i'm with friends i can crack jokes that have everyone laughing, then i maybe make 1 or 2 stupid comments all night and thats all i can think about. Cute girl looks at me in class and i feel like i can maybe chat with her during break, but when the break comes an hour later i feel like i'll be bothering her, even though in this case she was alone and doing nothing.

Insecurity, feelsbadman.jpg
I feel like that's normal.
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Old 07-08-2012, 05:51 PM    (permalink
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As do I. Happens to everyone at times.
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I wouldn't be sir prized if he passed McCoy on the depth chart. I think he might have a better arm and accurate arm then him from the highlights I thought. He also got some wheels too help us prepare for QB's as Wilson , RG3 and other runners etc.
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