Ideas For Jimmy Haslam's Tenure With The Browns

[robert pancake gallery]

I was brainstorming some ideas for Jimmy Haslam III to bring onboard now that he's the owner of the Browns franchise.

• selling stadium naming rights to skoal
• replacing cupholders with spittoons
• replacing hot dogs and italian sausage with grits and biscuits with gravy
• making WGAR 99.5 the official radio partner of the cleveland browns
• bringing the pro-bullriding and rodeo circuits to cleveland browns stadium
• replacing the great lakes science center adjacent to the stadium with a baptist church
• providing a reduced-rate parking lot on gameday exclusively for american-made trucks
• replacing available stadium beer selection with busch
• making the cleveland browns brand an official sponsor of NASCAR
• installing crucifixion insignia on the bottom halves of both goalposts
• halftime cornhole tournaments on the field for registered republicans
• making a bid to host the SEC championship game
• replace game programs with bibles
• show biblical verses on the scoreboard after big plays instead of highlights
• pregame chili cookoffs where jimmy himself is one of the judges
• promotional events such as "show off your daughter day", where if you bring your daughter in a short-skirt and/or low-cut top to the game that day, she gets in free and can enter a contest to meet jimmy in a one-on-one session
• work to get cracker barrel to do catering in louges
• at least one hooters restaurant kiosk on each stadium level
• outsource team shop responsibilities to walmart
• square-dance nights on saturdays before home games
• hanging of the gadsden flag in each corner of the stadium by american flags
• ban all rap music

these were just a couple ideas i had, let me know if you can think of some more

[BuckeyeDan17]

The nascar one made me laugh hard. In all actuality he is having 3 groups evaluate Cleveland browns stadium for a retractable roof so the stadium can be a venue to other events such as concerts, college games etc