1. Kansas City - Star Lotulelei -DT- Utah
This year's QBs are lol. Reid has a documented history of regularly taking DLs in the 1st round. Adding Star allows them to move Poe to DE where he'll be a much better fit.
2. Jacksonville - Bjoern Werner -DE- Florida State
They need a QB as badly as the Chiefs do, but should also seek to address that need later. Werner should provide an immediate boost to their nonexistent pass rush.
***Trade*** Cards send their 1 & 2 for Oakland's 1
3. Arizona - Luke Joeckel -OT- Texas A&M
Whoever lines up under center for the Redbirds is going to need better protection than this season's passers (term used loosely) were afforded.
4. Philadelphia - Dee Milliner -CB- Alabama
Time to retool the CB position. Reid essentially traded 1 CB (Samuel) for 2 (DRC, Asomugha), and somehow manged to leave the team with 0 viable starters. Well played, Andy.
5. Detroit - Damontre Moore -DE- Texas A&M
Avril is out the door, and there's no one else under contract that really threatens the edge.
6. Cleveland - Barkevious Mingo -OLB- LSU
Browns moving to 3-4. Gotta have a rush LB. Epic Combine performance vaults Mingo ahead of Jones and his medical red flag. Maybe I'm fudging a bit here. Get over it.
7. Oakland - Jarvis Jones -OLB- Georgia
Red flags be damned. Oakland needs a pass rush. Jones and Lamarr Houston could prove to be a very problematic pair of OLBs, assuming Jones' spine doesn't turn to goop and Houston's flashes of brilliance at OLB weren't a mirage.
8. Buffalo - Geno Smith -QB- WVU
Insert a QB here. Who the hell knows which QB will be drafted first?
9. New York Jets - Ryan Nassib -QB- Syracuse
Because f#ck the Bills, that's why. Really, though. Sanchez is a dead man walking. The Jets have to make arrangements for the future.
10. Tennessee - Eric Fisher -OT- Central Michigan
Titans fans want O-line? Here ya go.
11. San Diego - Manti Te'o -ILB- ND (Roll Tide)
I'm still laughing about the Jonas Mouton pick from a couple years ago.
12. Miami - Keenan Allen -WR- California
Their converted WR at QB needs a WR to play WR.
13. Tampa Bay - Xavier Rhodes -CB- FSU
CB is a pretty trendy pick here, but for good reason.
14. Carolina - Sheldon Richardson -DT- Mizzou
The Panthers have a pair of double digit sack artists at DE. Richardson getting pressure up the middle could make this D-line one of the league's best.
15. St. Louis - Chance Warmack -OG- Alabama
Fisher/Snead continue to pump size and strength into the trenches.
16. New Orleans - Jesse Williams -DT- Alabama
Should test really well and has a lot of upside.
17. Pittsburgh - Barkevious Mingo -OLB- LSU
Woodley and Harrison combined for just 10 sacks this year. Nuff said.
18. Dallas - Lane Johnson -OT- Oklahoma
Doug Free, you are free to seek employment elsewhere.
19. New York Giants - Alex Okafor -DE- Texas
Time to infuse another dose of talent into the DE rotation. His experience playing DT will help him find an early niche in NY's "NASCAR" packages.
20. Chicago - Oday Aboushi -OT- Virginia
Someone to help pick Cutler up off the turf.
21. Cincinnati - Ezekiel Ansah -DE- BYU
Trendy pick alert.
22. Minnesota - DeAndre Hopkins -WR- Clemson
Because f#ck your WR rankings, that's why.
23. St. Louis - Cordarrelle Patterson -WR- TN
Raw, but upside worth being patient for.
24. Indianapolis - Johnthan Banks -CB- MS St.
Wanted to give them a rush LB, but...oh well.
***Trade*** Oakland sends the 2nd round pick they received in the trade with the Cardinals, plus their own 4th round pick, to Seattle for the 25th overall selection.
25. Oakland - Tyler Eifert -TE- ND (Roll Tide)
Easy to argue for an OL or more defensive help here, but adding a legit redzone target, not to mention potential #1 receiving option, is just good business. Had to jump some teams likely targeting Eifert here.
26. Green Bay - Barrett Jones -OL- Alabama
He'll start somewhere, by golly.
27. Houston - Tavon Austin -WR- WVU
Speedy playmaker to help Matt Schaub stop failing.
28. Denver - Kenny Vaccaro -DB- Texas
This secondary needs Jesus. Since he's not coming back, Vaccaro will have to do.
29. Atlanta - Zach Ertz -TE- Stanford
I was stumped, so I reached. Sue me.
30. New England - Jonathan Cooper -OG- NC
Should have given them a TE just to be an ass.
31. San Francisco - Johnathan Hankins -DT- tOSU
Porche talent with a Kia motor. Harbaugh will get the best out of him.
32. Baltimore - Eric Reid -FS- LSU
Meh. Might as well.
inb4 "Move this to the Raiders team forum!"
God damn it.
No offense, but your Raiders draft sucks.