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Old 05-26-2010, 02:09 PM    (permalink
SuperMcGee
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Originally Posted by mqtirishfan View Post
Need a judgment call. I'm the other guy for a girl's relationship and she's probably breaking up with her boyfriend for me. But, she moved back home for the summer and hasn't done the breaking up part yet. Meanwhile, I'm stuck in town alone and waiting. Should I go for it with other girls in the mean-time, or wait for this other girl to come back?
I wouldn't be surprised (from a complete outsider's perspective) if she never even broke up with him. I obviously don't know this girl, but there are a lot of girls who live away from their boyfriends, maybe even talk about breaking up with them or how the boyfriend himself cheats on her, but are completely fine keeping their relationship intact while they do whatever.

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Originally Posted by Brent View Post
Unless they have daddy issues. I find the best girls are ones that arent only children. Something about having a brother/sister tends to make a person better in relationships. Maybe it has to do with growing up and sharing with your siblings or something like that... at least that's been my experience.
I agree with this. I think having a sibling of the opposite sex, especially, can make you much better in a relationship, be you a guy or a girl.
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Old 05-26-2010, 04:27 PM    (permalink
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Originally Posted by ATLDirtyBirds View Post
What's a solid response to a girl saying something like "You're so mean to me" or "You are such an asshole!"

Note: She's pretty much right on both accounts, but still laughs at most everything I say and still talks to me so I'm just looking for something solid to reply with or to do.
I would go with "clearly I'm not so bad, or you wouldn't bother hanging out with me..."
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Old 05-26-2010, 04:28 PM    (permalink
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Originally Posted by mqtirishfan View Post
Need a judgment call. I'm the other guy for a girl's relationship and she's probably breaking up with her boyfriend for me. But, she moved back home for the summer and hasn't done the breaking up part yet. Meanwhile, I'm stuck in town alone and waiting. Should I go for it with other girls in the mean-time, or wait for this other girl to come back?
The girl isn't yours until she ends it. You're not beholden to her in any way and shouldn't expect her to follow through. Remember, she didn't fulfill her part of her last relationship. There is a pattern of her doing what's best for her and not her partner. I would keep things casual.
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Old 05-26-2010, 04:40 PM    (permalink
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FML. You know the girl I have been asking about? Well I went on facebook today and I see this: "Nicole changed her relationship status from 'Single' to 'In a relationship'". My heart sank. Apparently he asked her out two days ago. This sucks too cause I felt we where getting closer each day since I posted. We talked and joked for a while today before I found out. Good news is tho, the guy is a senior(both me and the girl are sophmores) and will be going to college 5 hours away and the school year ends in less then 2 weeks. So do I keep this friendship going but don't get to attached to get stuck in the friend zone knowing they will become less distant once he goes to school and will most likely cheat on her? Please help.
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Old 05-26-2010, 04:45 PM    (permalink
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I mean you can keep the friendship going, but honestly bruh, with him being older and her being so young, she's gonna be completely wrapped around his finger. It's best you stop worrying about her as anything more than a friend, and get your eyes on someone else. Just my opinion though from my experience.
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Old 05-26-2010, 04:53 PM    (permalink
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Originally Posted by OSUGiants17 View Post
FML. You know the girl I have been asking about? Well I went on facebook today and I see this: "Nicole changed her relationship status from 'Single' to 'In a relationship'". My heart sank. Apparently he asked her out two days ago. This sucks too cause I felt we where getting closer each day since I posted. We talked and joked for a while today before I found out. Good news is tho, the guy is a senior(both me and the girl are sophmores) and will be going to college 5 hours away and the school year ends in less then 2 weeks. So do I keep this friendship going but don't get to attached to get stuck in the friend zone knowing they will become less distant once he goes to school and will most likely cheat on her? Please help.
Move on. There's plenty more girls out there. No need getting hurt seeing her with some other dude.
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Old 05-26-2010, 05:08 PM    (permalink
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Originally Posted by OSUGiants17 View Post
FML. You know the girl I have been asking about? Well I went on facebook today and I see this: "Nicole changed her relationship status from 'Single' to 'In a relationship'". My heart sank. Apparently he asked her out two days ago. This sucks too cause I felt we where getting closer each day since I posted. We talked and joked for a while today before I found out. Good news is tho, the guy is a senior(both me and the girl are sophmores) and will be going to college 5 hours away and the school year ends in less then 2 weeks. So do I keep this friendship going but don't get to attached to get stuck in the friend zone knowing they will become less distant once he goes to school and will most likely cheat on her? Please help.
Time to move on to greener pastures bud. IF she does have any feelings for you, then sticking by her during this time will only prolong a potential breakup between them. You'll be making yourself an intellectual ***** for her - as in she knows you'll be there for emotional support and all that other **** (especially when/if her BF is bad to her) without getting anything back in return except a big hug at the end of the night.

Break things off for awhile and pursue other girls. I'm not saying to completely ignore her. Be cordial and friendly still, but don't go out of your way whatsoever to give her attention. If, in a couple weeks (or after her BF moves - it might take that long depending how much she likes him) she starts asking why you haven't been talking or hanging out, you'll have a better idea how much she's interested.

As of right now, though, I'd say things are effectively dead for awhile. You're not prying a sophomore girl away from a guy that can drive her around, take her places, and is going to be ******* her every day until he leaves for college. It's just not gonna happen.
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Old 05-26-2010, 05:13 PM    (permalink
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I see where you guys are coming from, it just sucks that I was working hard to get with her and just as things start to pick up she gets in a relationship. Hopefully with summer coming up and never actually getting with her it will be easy to get over her and move on.
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Old 05-26-2010, 05:33 PM    (permalink
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Originally Posted by OSUGiants17 View Post
I see where you guys are coming from, it just sucks that I was working hard to get with her and just as things start to pick up she gets in a relationship. Hopefully with summer coming up and never actually getting with her it will be easy to get over her and move on.
Once you stop seeing her on a regular basis, you'll get over her. Same thing happened to me back in 8th grade. I was CRAZY about this girl. I was in like 4 classes with her. Talked to her all the time at lunch, on AIM, etc. She liked and was dating one of my friends. **** drove me insane. I was so hurt because obviously I felt like I was the one for her, not him.

Then we went on our 8th grade field trip to Universal Studios. Our class was divided up into like 5 groups of 6-7 people and with my luck, those two are in my group. It sucked. It hurt seeing them walking hand and hand and **** like that. Once summer came and I stopped seeing her daily, I dropped all feelings.

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Old 05-26-2010, 05:33 PM    (permalink
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and is going to be ******* her every day until he leaves for college.
man, I wish I could have had that.
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Old 05-26-2010, 05:36 PM    (permalink
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Originally Posted by Brent View Post
man, I wish I could have had that.
It's the only reason I got in a relationship halfway through my senior year. Really, senior year I think is a great time to get into a relationship. You're older so it's not hard at all to pull a hot younger chick (especially if you drive and she doesn't). It'll help you figure out who you're developing into as a person and what you like/don't like in the opposite sex. And you get laid consistently - which is a problem for ANY high school kid no matter how good looking you may be or how much game you have.

Suffice to say, though, the relationship ended not long after I moved to San Diego.

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Old 05-26-2010, 10:24 PM    (permalink
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When you guys are talking to a girl, what do you guys usually ask to get to know them better? I'm talking with this girl and I feel like I've run out of questions.
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Old 05-26-2010, 10:55 PM    (permalink
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What are you going to want for breakfast tomorrow morning?
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Old 05-26-2010, 10:56 PM    (permalink
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how do i get my girlfriend to stop holding out without making myself seem like a horny mchorn horn?
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Old 05-26-2010, 11:08 PM    (permalink
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When you guys are talking to a girl, what do you guys usually ask to get to know them better? I'm talking with this girl and I feel like I've run out of questions.
ask her about random celebrities you either love/hate to gauge her reaction. Then dump her if she says she likes Lady Gaga.
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Old 05-26-2010, 11:39 PM    (permalink
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That girl messaged me today and was talking to me while I was watching The Mystery Team. Anyways, she was like, " i haven't had any deep conversations with you lately" and ish like that and then was saying how she wanted to hang out again soon and then was reminding me that we have that movie list to watch together. I figured with her boyfriend being back in town that she wouldn't need her cuddle b**** anymore.

So do I keep on slowing conversation down and slowly fade away guys?
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Old 05-27-2010, 07:25 AM    (permalink
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So do I keep on slowing conversation down and slowly fade away guys?
Yes. When she calls again, talk but say that you are in the middle of something and you can't talk for long, or don't answer but reply with a short text essentially saying the same thing. Your conversing for that day should end there. Eventually, just stop answering her garbage. She'll figure it out eventually.
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Old 05-27-2010, 08:35 AM    (permalink
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ask her about random celebrities you either love/hate to gauge her reaction. Then dump her if she says she likes Lady Gaga.
and if she says Megan Fox, be sure to check her thumbs
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Old 05-27-2010, 08:38 AM    (permalink
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So do I keep on slowing conversation down and slowly fade away guys?
You did tap this already, correct? Always tap before you fade.
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Old 05-27-2010, 03:47 PM    (permalink
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FML. You know the girl I have been asking about? Well I went on facebook today and I see this: "Nicole changed her relationship status from 'Single' to 'In a relationship'". My heart sank. Apparently he asked her out two days ago. This sucks too cause I felt we where getting closer each day since I posted. We talked and joked for a while today before I found out. Good news is tho, the guy is a senior(both me and the girl are sophmores) and will be going to college 5 hours away and the school year ends in less then 2 weeks. So do I keep this friendship going but don't get to attached to get stuck in the friend zone knowing they will become less distant once he goes to school and will most likely cheat on her? Please help.
This is a pretty clear pattern, dude. You are going after girls who are unavailable for a reason. You knew she was dating someone, and you tried to worm your way in there. If her guy found out, he might beat the crap out of you, and I wouldnít blame him. Find a single girl, see if you can talk to her in a fun and flirt way (like you have been practicing with the last 2 girls), then ask her out.

I believe that subconsciously, you are petrified of getting rejected, so you are protecting yourself by going after a girl who is kind of available, but probably isnít. The common denominator here is you. You are picking the wrong girls. You are not making your move soon enough. You have some issues that you have to work out. The great news is that youíre 16. Everyone gets crushed like this. I made the same mistake at least twice in HS and once in college. You have time to figure things out.

There is nothing to be scared of. However, you have to let go pronto. Let her come to you. Donít be so available. Start finding someone who is new and available.
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Old 05-27-2010, 03:53 PM    (permalink
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Originally Posted by thefalconer View Post
how do i get my girlfriend to stop holding out without making myself seem like a horny mchorn horn?
This is a tougher one. Fact is that girls are emotional beings in addition to being sexual beings. Men are rational and sexual beings. If your girl has been burned in the past, she is going to be reticent to give it up. If she is a virgin, itís going to be a while. The key is to make her comfortable. Putting pressure in any way isnít going to get her to give it up if she hasnít already. If you pressure her before sheís ready, and she gives in, sheís going to feel guilty and hate you.

You need to convince her that itís her idea to have sex. You need to be attentive and fun without pushing her for sex. She is probably just as horny, but she has a mental block about it. Your job is to build her trust and make her want it and to ask you for it. If you put the time in, she will come along at her own pace.

Frankly, though,if youíre just looking for sex, donít put yourself in a relationship. The good girls arenít going to give it up easily. If you want a good girl, be prepared to work for it.
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Old 05-27-2010, 04:16 PM    (permalink
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Originally Posted by bsaza2358 View Post
This is a pretty clear pattern, dude. You are going after girls who are unavailable for a reason. You knew she was dating someone, and you tried to worm your way in there. If her guy found out, he might beat the crap out of you, and I wouldnít blame him. Find a single girl, see if you can talk to her in a fun and flirt way (like you have been practicing with the last 2 girls), then ask her out.

I believe that subconsciously, you are petrified of getting rejected, so you are protecting yourself by going after a girl who is kind of available, but probably isnít. The common denominator here is you. You are picking the wrong girls. You are not making your move soon enough. You have some issues that you have to work out. The great news is that youíre 16. Everyone gets crushed like this. I made the same mistake at least twice in HS and once in college. You have time to figure things out.

There is nothing to be scared of. However, you have to let go pronto. Let her come to you. Donít be so available. Start finding someone who is new and available.
I didnt actually know this one was in a relationship til yesterday and that was two weeks after I asked for advice and started to flirt. I tried to avoid her today, but she approached me today in one of the classes to joke around with me, I tried not to show interest but I didnt wanna be a complete asshole so I just talked for a little then said I had to get back to work. If she does the same thing tomorow, she has gotta have some interest. Whatever, summer is almost here and it shouldnt be hard to forget her. If I havent completely forgotten by next year and she is single again I might try, but only under thos circumstances.
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Old 05-27-2010, 04:23 PM    (permalink
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Originally Posted by OSUGiants17 View Post
I didnt actually know this one was in a relationship til yesterday and that was two weeks after I asked for advice and started to flirt. I tried to avoid her today, but she approached me today in one of the classes to joke around with me, I tried not to show interest but I didnt wanna be a complete asshole so I just talked for a little then said I had to get back to work. If she does the same thing tomorow, she has gotta have some interest. Whatever, summer is almost here and it shouldnt be hard to forget her. If I havent completely forgotten by next year and she is single again I might try, but only under thos circumstances.
Negative. A need for attention does not equal interest.
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Old 05-27-2010, 04:25 PM    (permalink
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Huh? I am confused now. When I asked questions earlier you guys said stay away and if she really does have some interest she will come to you.
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Old 05-27-2010, 04:30 PM    (permalink
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Negative. A need for attention does not equal interest.
This is oh so true.
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