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Old 04-01-2014, 01:18 AM    (permalink
BamaFalcon59
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Originally Posted by 49ersfan_87 View Post
the only thing i guess that that could qualify is she laughs at my jokes. but she hasn't touched my arm, flirted, etc. i'm sure there are a lot of other signs that i don't know about but i don't really think about that stuff, just the obvious ones and the gut feeling i get.

i'll probably ask her out soon just to find out (i'm guessing she'll say no, but who knows). my main issue is my anxiety. in my head its smooth and confident, in reality its just jitters and stuttering. i might have a beer before just to loosen up a bit.
Well, you are guessing she will say no... that is a problem. Moreover, I don't think alcohol is such a bad idea but do make sure you don't smell like alcohol when you ask her out.
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Old 04-01-2014, 01:37 AM    (permalink
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Well, you are guessing she will say no... that is a problem. Moreover, I don't think alcohol is such a bad idea but do make sure you don't smell like alcohol when you ask her out.
I fluctuate between great confidence and extreme self-doubt. Just yesterday I felt better about my chances. I'm guessing its nerves. I'm also insanely tired so maybe that has something to do with my confidence being shot.

If i do have a beer i'll chew some gum right after. I definitely open up with a drink or two but i'm just looking for a buzz.
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Old 04-01-2014, 08:16 AM    (permalink
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At the end of the day, you have to realize that you shouldn't give a ****. This isn't the girl of your dreams here.
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Old 04-01-2014, 10:26 AM    (permalink
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The most important thing is to realize you aren't a ***** and need to act accordingly.
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Old 04-03-2014, 02:30 AM    (permalink
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So if anyone cares, an update:

I talked to her after class and there was definitely a good vibe. Again, no obvious signs but it felt like she was into me this time, by the way she was talking to me, the fact that she goes to bed early for work but kept ignoring multiple buses to keep talking (and we weren't saying anything of real consequence), etc...i can go into detail if anyone really wants but the tl;dr is i had a good vibe.

And i possibly would have made a move....if my best friend didn't run into me while the two of us were talking. I wish i was making that up. Although tbh, i'm not 100% sure i would have gone through with it. I was trying to work my way into that discussion before my friend came by.

This was our last class...now my plan is to email or facebook her and ask her to meet up next week to work on our paper, and go along the lines of "when we're done this paper we have to celebrate this weekend" or something like that. And if we can't meet up, i'll just ask her online, as i guess i wouldn't have any other choice.

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Old 04-03-2014, 01:46 PM    (permalink
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You're over thinking it man. When you are going to be doing something or want to do something (simple as want to get lunch) just hit her up and be like, "hey I was going to grab some lunch and was wondering if you wanted to join me".

It keeps it casual, but she knows that you thought of her first.
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Old 04-04-2014, 10:34 AM    (permalink
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Any advice on how to break up with someone? Never done it, but planning on pulling the trigger today.
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Old 04-04-2014, 11:06 AM    (permalink
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Any advice on how to break up with someone? Never done it, but planning on pulling the trigger today.
man up do it face to face and keep it simple without going into alot of details.
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Old 04-05-2014, 09:09 AM    (permalink
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Any advice on how to break up with someone? Never done it, but planning on pulling the trigger today.
Just be honest with her and straight forward. Don't go in to hurt her feelings. Just tell her it's not working out and that you want to see other people.

If the reason you're breaking up with her is because you want her best friend - you might want to be more tactful than to say that, though.
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Old 04-05-2014, 02:47 PM    (permalink
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Send her an email.
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Old 04-09-2014, 12:30 AM    (permalink
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So i asked a girl if she wanted to celebrate our final paper/end of semester with me, and she said "well, we can't do it on Thursday" (i had just told her how i had a ton of exams/papers to work on Thursday night/Friday morning). Thats pretty much all she/we said about that....i've yet to respond. if a girl was into you they would have brought up days where neither of us were busy, right?

I'm guessing I should be taking it as a rejection...thats my overwhelming gut instinct.

(this is done over email because i have no reason to see her in school, our class is over. also, my plan to ask her out in person was ruined by my friend running into us. read this page, my earlier posts should be at the top of this page/previous page).
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Old 04-09-2014, 12:32 AM    (permalink
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Why wouldn't you follow it up by asking when you can celebrate?
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Old 04-09-2014, 12:37 AM    (permalink
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So i asked a girl if she wanted to celebrate our final paper/end of semester with me, and she said "well, we can't do it on Thursday" (i had just told her how i had a ton of exams/papers to work on Thursday night/Friday morning). Thats pretty much all she/we said about that....i've yet to respond. if a girl was into you they would have brought up days where neither of us were busy, right?

I'm guessing I should be taking it as a rejection...thats my overwhelming gut instinct.

(this is done over email because i have no reason to see her in school, our class is over. also, my plan to ask her out in person was ruined by my friend running into us. read this page, my earlier posts should be at the top of this page/previous page).
Do you think you'll have more classes with each other? If not, I'd say how does Friday night sound and go for it all because you don't want to be a weekday guy.
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JBalla is mormon, so naturally he assumes that whenever you get one marriage done, another two or five are in the works.

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Old 04-09-2014, 12:37 AM    (permalink
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So i asked a girl if she wanted to celebrate our final paper/end of semester with me, and she said "well, we can't do it on Thursday" (i had just told her how i had a ton of exams/papers to work on Thursday night/Friday morning). Thats pretty much all she/we said about that....i've yet to respond. if a girl was into you they would have brought up days where neither of us were busy, right?

I'm guessing I should be taking it as a rejection...thats my overwhelming gut instinct.

(this is done over email because i have no reason to see her in school, our class is over. also, my plan to ask her out in person was ruined by my friend running into us. read this page, my earlier posts should be at the top of this page/previous page).
Do you think you'll have more classes with each other? If not, I'd say how does Friday night sound and go for it all because you don't want to be a weekday guy.
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JBalla is mormon, so naturally he assumes that whenever you get one marriage done, another two or five are in the works.

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Old 04-09-2014, 12:38 AM    (permalink
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Why wouldn't you follow it up by asking when you can celebrate?
i edited my post, this is (unfortunately) all being done via email. our class ended a week ago, my last chance in person got flubbed by a random event (friend running into us) and i don't have her #. I asked her to meet up with me this week at school (to meet up for "school" work, but really so i could ask her out in person) but she lives too far, and i believe thats legit. So i went by email because i figure i have nothing to lose.

I haven't responded yet to this latest reply.

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Do you think you'll have more classes with each other? If not, I'd say how does Friday night sound and go for it all because you don't want to be a weekday guy.
Nope, class is over, just working on our final project. I was thinking of sending this reply (how about the next night then, something like that). I just wanted to run it by you guys and sleep on it.

If we were talking in person, i'd probably say that. But for better or worse i tend to think on things when communicating by email/facebook/text.

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Old 04-09-2014, 12:44 AM    (permalink
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There's no need to run it by anyone, that's absolutely the play here, especially if she said "well we can't on Thursday". Usually that's her leaving the door open to you suggesting another day.. So... Suggest another day.
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Old 04-09-2014, 12:47 AM    (permalink
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My girl is wanting to end things because I refuse to not wave at my friends while they walk by us when we are talking. She says I am staring at other girls and not giving her my full attention.

After making me stop hugging my girlfriends, which was fine I guess.

She says I am disrespecting her and just cries and cries and cries. And she's 24, 2 years older than me.
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Old 04-09-2014, 12:48 AM    (permalink
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The ex has a new boyfriend.

I thought I was FULLY over her - but the fact that I heard of this, that it bothered me and I felt like posting it makes it evident that is not the case.

Bah. Enough of that.
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Old 04-09-2014, 12:55 AM    (permalink
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My girl is wanting to end things because I refuse to not wave at my friends while they walk by us when we are talking. She says I am staring at other girls and not giving her my full attention.

After making me stop hugging my girlfriends, which was fine I guess.

She says I am disrespecting her and just cries and cries and cries. And she's 24, 2 years older than me.
Get a new gf. I've learned the hard way, that that never, ever changes. Get out while you can.
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Old 04-09-2014, 04:27 AM    (permalink
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49er - In my past experience with girls being a bit flakey, I just put the ball in their court (rather then basing your plans on them). Just make plans with your buddies and say "hey, we are doing this on this day. You should come by." If she comes cool, if not then forget her.

Bama - It's not about girls like that. If she wants to end a relationship for stupid **** like that, then she probably isn't someone you'd want to date in the first place. Nobody needs that kind of drama in their life.
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Old 04-09-2014, 08:50 AM    (permalink
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Originally Posted by MetSox17 View Post
There's no need to run it by anyone, that's absolutely the play here, especially if she said "well we can't on Thursday". Usually that's her leaving the door open to you suggesting another day.. So... Suggest another day.
Yea I second this
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Old 04-09-2014, 10:05 AM    (permalink
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Get a new gf. I've learned the hard way, that that never, ever changes. Get out while you can.
Yeah that is the tough truth. Unfortunately she does a lot right. Would never cheat on me, sexy latina girl, buys me food, etc etc.
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Old 04-09-2014, 11:58 AM    (permalink
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Yeah that is the tough truth. Unfortunately she does a lot right. Would never cheat on me, sexy latina girl, buys me food, etc etc.
there are plenty of those girls without the baggage.
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Old 04-09-2014, 12:18 PM    (permalink
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Most girls will buy you food if you just let them. Women want to do nice things for us the same way that we want to do nice things for them. It's fun to do nice things for people that you care about, but a lot of men have some macho obsession with not letting women do nice things for them. Then their girlfriends cheat on them with assholes like me.
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Old 04-09-2014, 01:58 PM    (permalink
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I let and encourage my girlfriend to do things for me, and I very much enjoy it, but I do a ton for her, mostly because I love her and partially because it's wired in my brain to want to do everything for my girlfriend. **** gets rough sometimes though because she has nutty mood swings.
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