Relationship Advice Thread - Page 56

Brent · 03-15-2009, 09:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by I KNOW IT ALL

Nothing is worse than when a women is obviously into you but they just don't want to get that reputation as a "one night stand" type of girl.

if she is into you, and you know it, but she wants to leave or whatever, ask for a number

NY+Giants=NYG · 03-15-2009, 09:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by I KNOW IT ALL

How do you guys deal with women not wanting to leave with you (from a party or bar) because they don't want to look like ***** in front of their friends? This is a common snare for me and I haven't figured out a way to consistently get through it.

Nothing is worse than when a women is obviously into you but they just don't want to get that reputation as a "one night stand" type of girl.

She can wait for her friends to leave, or take her to another bar, stay for one drink, and then bounce with her. This way you can get some alone time with her, and then leave from there whenever you want. That's usually the importance of a wing man at that point. They hang out with the friends while you do your thing.

bsaza2358 · 03-16-2009, 08:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by I KNOW IT ALL

How do you guys deal with women not wanting to leave with you (from a party or bar) because they don't want to look like ***** in front of their friends? This is a common snare for me and I haven't figured out a way to consistently get through it.

Nothing is worse than when a women is obviously into you but they just don't want to get that reputation as a "one night stand" type of girl.

That is really her problem, but if you have to have her that night, just give her your # and tell her you're gonna head out. Leave, go get a hot dog or something, then she'll follow. It adds to the excitement because she's acting like a "super spy" with her friends. Make it sound like a game. If she doesn't go for that, whatever. It's her issue.

Hollywood · 03-16-2009, 04:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by I KNOW IT ALL

How do you guys deal with women not wanting to leave with you (from a party or bar) because they don't want to look like ***** in front of their friends? This is a common snare for me and I haven't figured out a way to consistently get through it.

Nothing is worse than when a women is obviously into you but they just don't want to get that reputation as a "one night stand" type of girl.

So you know it all except that girls don't under any situation want to look like a **** with some random guy in front of their girl friends?

ATLDirtyBirds · 03-16-2009, 06:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by I KNOW IT ALL

How do you guys deal with women not wanting to leave with you (from a party or bar) because they don't want to look like ***** in front of their friends? This is a common snare for me and I haven't figured out a way to consistently get through it.

Nothing is worse than when a women is obviously into you but they just don't want to get that reputation as a "one night stand" type of girl.

Tell her that her hot friends are welcome to join.

ChezPower4 · 03-17-2009, 08:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by I KNOW IT ALL

How do you guys deal with women not wanting to leave with you (from a party or bar) because they don't want to look like ***** in front of their friends? This is a common snare for me and I haven't figured out a way to consistently get through it.

Nothing is worse than when a women is obviously into you but they just don't want to get that reputation as a "one night stand" type of girl.

You have to make her friends approve of you. She's going out with her friends so that they can protect each other. So if they don't know and/or don't like you. Your not going to go home with their friend, her friends will make sure of that. If her friends like you and think that your cool, then they're not going to care if you leave with her nor will they give her **** about being a **** for leaving with you. I've seen many people solve this problem by just winning over her friends

I KNOW IT ALL · 03-17-2009, 09:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChezPower4

You have to make her friends approve of you. She's going out with her friends so that they can protect each other. So if they don't know and/or don't like you. Your not going to go home with their friend, her friends will make sure of that. If her friends like you and think that your cool, then they're not going to care if you leave with her nor will they give her **** about being a **** for leaving with you. I've seen many people solve this problem by just winning over her friends

Half the time I know the friends already and that makes it even worse because you're all in the same social circle. I don't think it's that the friends don't like me or approve of me, it's just that the girl doesn't want to be known as a girl who will go home with somebody they just met that night.

someone447 · 03-17-2009, 09:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by I KNOW IT ALL

Half the time I know the friends already and that makes it even worse because you're all in the same social circle. I don't think it's that the friends don't like me or approve of me, it's just that the girl doesn't want to be known as a girl who will go home with somebody they just met that night.

So just **** her the next time you see her. One night stands are overrated anyway.

I KNOW IT ALL · 03-17-2009, 09:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by someone447

So just **** her the next time you see her. One night stands are overrated anyway.

Who knows when the next time I'm going to see them is going to be? Plus then you need to restart your whole game which is a lot of work, other guys come into the equation, etc.

I eat what I kill, and I like my food fresh.

someone447 · 03-17-2009, 09:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by I KNOW IT ALL

Who knows when the next time I'm going to see them is going to be? Plus then you need to restart your whole game which is a lot of work, other guys come into the equation, etc.

I eat what I kill, and I like my food fresh.

Get her number and call her to hang out later that week...

Obviously this only applies if her friends **** block you.

ChezPower4 · 03-17-2009, 12:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by I KNOW IT ALL

Who knows when the next time I'm going to see them is going to be? Plus then you need to restart your whole game which is a lot of work, other guys come into the equation, etc.

I eat what I kill, and I like my food fresh.

Get her phone #, if she's going to go home and sleep with you can get her phone #. Then just set up a date the next day, and make sure by the end of the night you've got some reason that she should stop by your house for a little bit.

bsaza2358 · 03-17-2009, 12:58 PM

I think he thinks that the girl is ready to go, but she doesn't want the judgmental stuff that her friends throw when she acts like a sloooot. In that case, time the leave, make it like a game, or get the # and booty call later.

d34ng3l021 · 03-21-2009, 12:52 PM

Okay. I am going to come here before I mess things up.

I have a tendency to become really good friends with girls. I would say that I am a shy person (thats slowly changing) and so it takes a while for a girl to really get to know me, after which she could possibly fall for me. But by that time, I am already just one of her 'friends' and she has another boyfriend. The reason for which I become good friends with girls in somewhat unknown. Maybe its just cause I'm nice, listen to their problems while telling some of my own? I dont know.

Anyway, there's this sister of a friend who is a grade above us. I see her occasionally when I hang out with her brother during a couple of parties (i dont go to too many) and we talk occasionally, but never have really had a conversation. She facebook chats me the other day and we talk for a good 45 minutes about a bunch of stuff and I would say that we have a lot in common and I do like talking to her.

So here is the question. How should I make sure that I don't become just one of her friends? What should I do differently so that it doesn't take forever for a girl to fall for me?

AlexDown · 03-21-2009, 01:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by d34ng3l021

Okay. I am going to come here before I mess things up.

I have a tendency to become really good friends with girls. I would say that I am a shy person (thats slowly changing) and so it takes a while for a girl to really get to know me, after which she could possibly fall for me. But by that time, I am already just one of her 'friends' and she has another boyfriend. The reason for which I become good friends with girls in somewhat unknown. Maybe its just cause I'm nice, listen to their problems while telling some of my own? I dont know.

Anyway, there's this sister of a friend who is a grade above us. I see her occasionally when I hang out with her brother during a couple of parties (i dont go to too many) and we talk occasionally, but never have really had a conversation. She facebook chats me the other day and we talk for a good 45 minutes about a bunch of stuff and I would say that we have a lot in common and I do like talking to her.

So here is the question. How should I make sure that I don't become just one of her friends? What should I do differently so that it doesn't take forever for a girl to fall for me?

Make it clear that you are interested in her, more then a friend. Ask her on a date.

NotRickJames · 03-21-2009, 01:48 PM

Yesterday, I managed to reel in a prom date.

*I walk up to her*

Me: "Hey, [insert her name here], I am going to prom with the most gorgeous and coolest girl at this school."
Her: "Uh...who?"
Me: "You."

BINGO. Epic win. It worked like a charm. As a sidenote, I wasn't using hyperbole when I said she was the most gorgeous and coolest girl at the school, 'tis the truth.

Brent · 03-21-2009, 01:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by d34ng3l021

So here is the question. How should I make sure that I don't become just one of her friends? What should I do differently so that it doesn't take forever for a girl to fall for me?

Tell her that you enjoy talking to her, or some ******** like that, and ask her out on a date.

Quote:

Originally Posted by NotRickJames

Epic win.

That's rather bold. I guess with good delivery, it worked.

NotRickJames · 03-21-2009, 02:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brent

Tell her that you enjoy talking to her, or some ******** like that, and ask her out on a date.

That's rather bold. I guess with good delivery, it worked.

Yeah, it's all about confidence. If anyone of you guys decides to use that line, only use it if you're sure that you're going to sound confident when you say it. I use the word "sound" because you don't necessarily have to actually be confident, so long as you can mimic it. I have a few friends who are very good at acting confident when they're really not. A lot of people tend to say girls can see right through that.....bollocks. I've seen those friends put on confidence and girls clearly have no idea that they really doubt themselves.

So, if you're not confident and cannot act confident, then don't use that line. You'll look like a fool. As Brent said, it's all about delivery and confidence.

someone447 · 03-21-2009, 02:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by d34ng3l021

So here is the question. How should I make sure that I don't become just one of her friends?

What should I do differently so that it doesn't take forever for a girl to fall for me?

Just make sure she knows that you are after being more than just friends. It is a myth that nice guys get put in the friend zone, guys who are not confident get put in the friend zone.

Be confident, and don't care if she falls for you or not. Unfortunately there isn't really a trick to getting girls to fall for you.

djp · 03-21-2009, 02:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by d34ng3l021

Okay. I am going to come here before I mess things up.

I have a tendency to become really good friends with girls. I would say that I am a shy person (thats slowly changing) and so it takes a while for a girl to really get to know me, after which she could possibly fall for me. But by that time, I am already just one of her 'friends' and she has another boyfriend. The reason for which I become good friends with girls in somewhat unknown. Maybe its just cause I'm nice, listen to their problems while telling some of my own? I dont know.

Anyway, there's this sister of a friend who is a grade above us. I see her occasionally when I hang out with her brother during a couple of parties (i dont go to too many) and we talk occasionally, but never have really had a conversation. She facebook chats me the other day and we talk for a good 45 minutes about a bunch of stuff and I would say that we have a lot in common and I do like talking to her.

So here is the question. How should I make sure that I don't become just one of her friends? What should I do differently so that it doesn't take forever for a girl to fall for me?

Act like a dickhead at first.

Let me quote Dazed and Confused..

Quote:

You know that Julie chick? Loves you. You want her? Gotta play it cool, you know. You can't let her know how much you like ?cause if she knows, she'll dump you like that. Believe me. Like, if she asks you if you want a ride, you say, "No, I've got my own ride, but maybe I'll see you later." Sounds stupid, doesn't it? It works.

someone447 · 03-21-2009, 02:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NotRickJames

Yeah, it's all about confidence. If anyone of you guys decides to use that line, only use it if you're sure that you're going to sound confident when you say it. I use the word "sound" because you don't necessarily have to actually be confident, so long as you can mimic it. I have a few friends who are very good at acting confident when they're really not. A lot of people tend to say girls can see right through that.....bollocks. I've seen those friends put on confidence and girls clearly have no idea that they really doubt themselves.

So, if you're not confident and cannot act confident, then don't use that line. You'll look like a fool. As Brent said, it's all about delivery and confidence.

You are in high school, high school girls(and guys) can barely see what is right in front of their face, much less what someone is trying to hide. Give it a few years and fake confidence doesn't work. But by then, the people who have had to fake the confidence will have developed it.

But that is a nice line, if its your style. My style is much too understated for something like that. It would just look ridiculous because I would feel ridiculous saying something like that.

someone447 · 03-21-2009, 02:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by djp

Act like a dickhead at first.

Bad advice. The last thing the world needs is more dickheads. It is entirely possible to be a nice guy and get laid.

Those guys who complain about never getting laid because they are too "nice" really aren't that nice. They are manipulative, bitter assholes who think by acting friendly they will be able to maneuver into a girls pants. They are just as much of an asshole as the typical "asshole" who gets all the girls.

Be a nice, genuine, CONFIDENT guy and you won't have a problem getting laid. Be yourself, but realize any specific girl isn't important in the big scheme of things. The way I look at things is like this: She isn't my first, and she isn't going to be my last, so if I **** her, great. If I don't no big loss.

Allow me to guote the Tao te Ching(isn't about women, but it sure as hell applies here)

Quote:

Free from desire, you realize the mystery.
Caught in desire, you see only the manifestations.

Be confident and don't care about ******* any specific girl(while still letting her know that you want to.)

bearsfan_51 · 03-21-2009, 02:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by d34ng3l021

Okay. I am going to come here before I mess things up.

I have a tendency to become really good friends with girls. I would say that I am a shy person (thats slowly changing) and so it takes a while for a girl to really get to know me, after which she could possibly fall for me. But by that time, I am already just one of her 'friends' and she has another boyfriend. The reason for which I become good friends with girls in somewhat unknown. Maybe its just cause I'm nice, listen to their problems while telling some of my own? I dont know.

Anyway, there's this sister of a friend who is a grade above us. I see her occasionally when I hang out with her brother during a couple of parties (i dont go to too many) and we talk occasionally, but never have really had a conversation. She facebook chats me the other day and we talk for a good 45 minutes about a bunch of stuff and I would say that we have a lot in common and I do like talking to her.

So here is the question. How should I make sure that I don't become just one of her friends? What should I do differently so that it doesn't take forever for a girl to fall for me?

A few things

1) There is no possible way that you could know if you have a ton in common after a 45 minute facebook chat. Not that it is integral to the rest of your story, but I would suggest keeping a little perspective here.

2) You can't make sure of anything. It seems unlikely, however, that she would message you (I'm assuming she messaged you, if not that changes a lot of things) if she wasn't at least somewhat interested. If you find yourself often in the friend zone it could be that you're just a really nice guy. Or that you aren't aggressive enough with women. Or that you just aren't very physically good looking and are going for women that probably would never be interested in you no matter how you act.

3) Ignore the act like a dick stuff. Unless all you want to do is have sex with vapid and worthless women. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, I spent many years of my life having sex with vapid and worthless women, but it sounds like you actually care about liking someone (judging by your desire to communicate and have things in common). So, let me repeat, if you want to like and respect the girl, don't act like a dick to her. Even if it works (and lord knows that it does) you will not be able to change your perspective of her (correct at that) that she doesn't respect herself and is probably not worth much more than a blowjob in the back row at the movies. It's impossible to do the hardass routine and establish a meaningful and deep relationship. Any girl worth a **** will blow you off, and subconciously knowing that you'll never respect a girl who puts up with it.

You sound like a good guy so I wish you luck, but remember, being a friend isn't the worst thing in the world. It's like being the nerd in high school. It may suck at the time, but in 10 years everyone will be working for you.

ATLDirtyBirds · 03-21-2009, 03:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by d34ng3l021

Okay. I am going to come here before I mess things up.

I have a tendency to become really good friends with girls. I would say that I am a shy person (thats slowly changing) and so it takes a while for a girl to really get to know me, after which she could possibly fall for me. But by that time, I am already just one of her 'friends' and she has another boyfriend. The reason for which I become good friends with girls in somewhat unknown. Maybe its just cause I'm nice, listen to their problems while telling some of my own? I dont know.

Anyway, there's this sister of a friend who is a grade above us. I see her occasionally when I hang out with her brother during a couple of parties (i dont go to too many) and we talk occasionally, but never have really had a conversation. She facebook chats me the other day and we talk for a good 45 minutes about a bunch of stuff and I would say that we have a lot in common and I do like talking to her.

So here is the question. How should I make sure that I don't become just one of her friends? What should I do differently so that it doesn't take forever for a girl to fall for me?

Get the friend to gage her interest for you. See where it's at, and adjust accordingly.

JeffSamardzijaIRISH · 03-21-2009, 03:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bearsfan_51

It's impossible to do the hardass routine and establish a meaningful and deep relationship.

This is completely wrong. Most people who do act like dicks don't do it right, and go way over the top. If you do it right (meaning act somewhat of a dick, but also show that you have a nice side), then it works like a charm and you can definitely get into a relationship. The whole point of acting like a dick is to get people to notice you, so once they do, then bring out a nicer side and charm them. This approach doesn't work for everyone, but if done right, it definitely works and can get into a meaningful and deep relationship.

someone447 · 03-21-2009, 03:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JeffSamardzijaIRISH

This is completely wrong. Most people who do act like dicks don't do it right, and go way over the top. If you do it right (meaning act somewhat of a dick, but also show that you have a nice side), then it works like a charm and you can definitely get into a relationship. The whole point of acting like a dick is to get people to notice you, so once they do, then bring out a nicer side and charm them. This approach doesn't work for everyone, but if done right, it definitely works and can get into a meaningful and deep relationship.

WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG!

JUST ******* WRONG!

Act like yourself if you want to get in a relationship(a more confident version if you aren't already confident, but yourself nonetheless).

If you are a dick, be a dick. If you are nice, be nice. Just be yourself.