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Old 04-16-2009, 02:39 PM    (permalink
tjsunstein
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Why? What is this? Ew.
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:39 PM    (permalink
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lol shut up, you tell a story then
Hahaha, you should have at least not plagiarized it. How about I steal the other two stories from Guts but we won't tell anyone?
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:40 PM    (permalink
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Hahaha, you should have at least not plagiarized it. How about I steal the other two stories from Guts but we won't tell anyone?
fine go ahead, as long as doing dead bodies arent involved
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:41 PM    (permalink
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His intestine is fricken stuck to the filter. He tries to pull it loose but it just hurts alot and wont come off. So hes losing breath and decides to bite it off
There are many other crappy stories for to waste your time with here: http://www.snopes.com/
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:41 PM    (permalink
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fine go ahead, as long as doing dead bodies arent involved
Hey you started it. Never question my knowledge of necrophilia.
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:42 PM    (permalink
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There are many other crappy stories for to waste your time with here: http://www.snopes.com/
dont be a sour puss these are quality
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:43 PM    (permalink
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These are hilarious. Ballin's next story will involve some kids camping and a mysterious hook.
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:44 PM    (permalink
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These are hilarious. Ballin's next story will involve some kids camping and a mysterious hook.
oh damn, i need some new material now :(
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:45 PM    (permalink
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STORY 3-(last one of the day for me)

So our football team sucks ridiculously, im on it lol, and we wound up winning our opener somehow. The soccer kids basically run the parties because they can do whatever they want their coach doesnt care because he thinks theyre all gods.

So there is a party at a football seniors house, he has beer and everything, i left because i dont drink and i was frankly not going to get any. So this senior guy who was a virgin and clearly because he acted so gay, finally got some, but they decided to leave and go to her house (i dont know why no parents were in the houses).

So they get there, things get serious, she gets horny and asks him if he has a condum. And of course he doesnt hes a virgin. So she asks if he has lube. and he doesnt. They start doing it but it doesnt feel good. So they look for something to use, and of course they go into the fridge.

She sees cottage cheese on the counter and they start using it. And its fine. The next day shes like having crazy orgasms in class and does know why. She finnaly goes to the nurse (she gets asked sexual stuff all the time) and asks her whats wrong. So of course the nurse asks to see her vag and takes out her gloves. She reaches in after asking her wat she did and the girl said she used cottage cheese and all.

The nurse takes her hand out and there are maggots in her palm.
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:46 PM    (permalink
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Seriously, excellent thread Ballin. I am laughing at the fact that you seemed to have believed all these stories that people told you (although the Guts story did happen, just not to a friend of a friend). I also love that you defend these stories.
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:47 PM    (permalink
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oh damn, i need some new material now :(
Go with three bears leave the house and a blonde goes into the house.....you finish the rest.
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:53 PM    (permalink
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Seriously, excellent thread Ballin. I am laughing at the fact that you seemed to have believed all these stories that people told you (although the Guts story did happen, just not to a friend of a friend). I also love that you defend these stories.
hey im a believer in the creepy crawlies. plus the second one was probably made up although its possible it could happen.

the new story is above
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:53 PM    (permalink
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Congratulations Ballin, you are officially a part of NFLDC lore and will never live this down.
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:54 PM    (permalink
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Here i've got a good story for you, one that I was actually around to witness. Was at a friends, bunch of people over, lots of drinking taking place. Now I have two friends notorious for passing out. Well call them Steve & Mike. Steve passed out first upstairs on the couch. So like usual, we decided to mess with him. Well Mike took it a bit far. How many of you are familiar with Dave's Insanity Sauce?



Well the stuff is ridiculously hot. Mike ended up pouring this sauce all over Steve's face then wandered off to the basement with some chick, most assumed they were hooking up. A little later Steve wakes up and the sauce goes immediately into his eyes as he opens them. He starts yelling and screaming rather high pitched like, wakes up my buddies roommate who was sleeping and had work in the morning. Roommate was pissed, Steve was pissed (i was entertained).

Shortly after this the chick who had gone downstairs with Mike comes storming back up and leaves without saying anything. One of the other guys who lives in the house goes downstairs to find Mike passed out on his bed with his pants around his ankles and his dick hanging out. Apparently he had fallen asleep mid blow job. Well Steve has an idea. We get another girl there to take the insanity sauce down stairs and rub it all over Mikes dick. Well needless to say shortly after that Mike comes sprinting up the stairs screaming and cussing about his dick. He grabs a half gallon of ice cream from the freezer and proceeds to hump & have sex with it for the next half hour.

To this day we still call him hot rod.

The end.
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:55 PM    (permalink
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I want to punch you in the mouth Ballin. If anyone knows who I am talking about, you sound exactly like Karl Pilkington (if you don't you need to listen to the podcasts he is in, rarely has anything made me laugh as much as those podcastst). This is hilarious. There is no way the ******* happened to someone you know. No ******* way.
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:57 PM    (permalink
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lol nice one peefs, not sure how you fall asleep mid blowjob though
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:58 PM    (permalink
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I want to punch you in the mouth Ballin. If anyone knows who I am talking about, you sound exactly like Karl Pilkington (if you don't you need to listen to the podcasts he is in, rarely has anything made me laugh as much as those podcastst). This is hilarious. There is no way the ******* happened to someone you know. No ******* way.
all i have to say is, some crazy **** can happen. and Marijuanna is a hell of a drug
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Old 04-16-2009, 02:58 PM    (permalink
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lol nice one peefs, not sure how you fall asleep mid blowjob though
The guy was infamous for passing out. Get that dude drunk and there is a 90% chance hes passing out for at least a couple hours somewhere in your house.
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Old 04-16-2009, 03:00 PM    (permalink
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The end.
That sauce is pretty good considering how hot it is.


Also, if that really happened that is awesome. I remember someone putting hot sauce in a friends ear and he got all pissed off saying "I have had an ear infection since I was 7yrs old" he was like 15-16 at the time.
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Old 04-16-2009, 03:00 PM    (permalink
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BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.
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Originally Posted by The Peefs View Post
The guy was infamous for passing out. Get that dude drunk and there is a 90% chance hes passing out for at least a couple hours somewhere in your house.
and he still does it knowing that he'll pass out thats funny in itself or just stupid
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I ****** hate you, stupid *** smd
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Old 04-16-2009, 03:02 PM    (permalink
Dr. Gonzo
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Dr. Gonzo is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.Dr. Gonzo is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.Dr. Gonzo is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.Dr. Gonzo is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.Dr. Gonzo is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.Dr. Gonzo is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.Dr. Gonzo is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.Dr. Gonzo is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.Dr. Gonzo is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.Dr. Gonzo is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.Dr. Gonzo is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.
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all i have to say is, some crazy **** can happen. and Marijuanna is a hell of a drug
Marijuana doesn't make people stick cottage cheese in their vag. What was it weed laced with Heroin? Who does that. Why did she not notice maggots falling out of her *****. This story doesn't add up. The guy never getting liad because he acted gay. WTF? Why not use butter instead of cottage cheese? Did she not realize that cottage cheese goes bad. What. The. ****.
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Old 04-16-2009, 03:02 PM    (permalink
JHG722
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JHG722 could make a wolverine purr.JHG722 could make a wolverine purr.JHG722 could make a wolverine purr.JHG722 could make a wolverine purr.JHG722 could make a wolverine purr.JHG722 could make a wolverine purr.JHG722 could make a wolverine purr.
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Old 04-16-2009, 03:02 PM    (permalink
BaLLiN
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BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.
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Congratulations Ballin, you are officially a part of NFLDC lore and will never live this down.
its actually SWDC but i liked the old one better :(
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I ****** hate you, stupid *** smd
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Old 04-16-2009, 03:04 PM    (permalink
BaLLiN
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BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.BaLLiN is kind of a big deal around here, people know him.
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Marijuana doesn't make people stick cottage cheese in their vag. What was it weed laced with Heroin? Who does that. Why did she not notice maggots falling out of her *****. This story doesn't add up. The guy never getting liad because he acted gay. WTF? Why not use butter instead of cottage cheese? Did she not realize that cottage cheese goes bad. What. The. ****.
well what if she did have butter? cottage cheese is the next best thing, and maybe she has a very deep vag? i didnt say she had a billion of these guys she had some. and i meant like in a non homosexual way GOD
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I ****** hate you, stupid *** smd
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Old 04-16-2009, 03:05 PM    (permalink
RAVENS/WIZARDS/ORIOLES
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its actually SWDC but i liked the old one better :(
When I type in NFLDraftcountdown.com this site comes up so NFLDC is correct
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Just let it go RWO.
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