I went to college at UW ~ Madison and have many vague memories that include large amounts of alcohol, etc. This is probably too long, but it is one of my favorite stories....
I was out drinking with a bunch of friends one night. We were doing massive amounts of shots and closed down the bar. We were headed back to a buddy's apartment for a night cap. Well, his building was having some sort of Mexican Fiesta that weekend, so they had sombraros lying all around the front desk area. As we walked by i stole one of the hats (this will come up later ;)). As everyone walks toward the elevator, a girl (let's call her Emily) and i snuck out the side door.
We made our way back to her apartment across town, and started to go at it. We were in her bedroom, completely naked, "gettin' it on" when we could hear screaming out in the streets. The screaming kept getting closer and closer. Pretty soon the screaming was in her building (a house split into several apartments) and then right outside of her bedroom door!
By this time, penetration had occurred (repeatedly ;)) and the screamer kicked in her bedroom door and started screaming at the 2 of us: "You *****, you ****, i love you, **** you!!!" etc. He was one of the people that we were out drinking with & had been pining over Emily for quite some time.
So there i am, sitting on the end of the bed with a missle. I tell the guy that he has to get out, which he does, reluctantly/amazingly without conflict. After he leaves, we get back to what we were doing. (Amazing concentration, i know :)) While we are humping, we can still hear this guy yelling at us from the street.
By now it was about 3 or 4 in the morning and some of her neighbors were annoyed and called the police. We heard the police subdue him and then there was a knock on Emily's door. Its the cops. They want to interview us, so i crawl out of bed, with the sombraro still on & wrap a towel around my waist.
I had to do an interview with 2 female cops for about 10 minutes wearing nothing but a sombraro & towel.. drunk off my ass. Trying to get a timeline of the events, one of the cops asked me: "So, he came into the apartment while you two were, uh, getting intimate?" I laughed and said something like: "You could say that"... with my drunk-ass slurred speech, of course.
Well, they hauled that dude off to detox & Emily and I went back and finished our night/morning off right!
A long story, yes... but i laugh everytime i think about it.
Originally Posted by MichaelJordanEberle (sabf)
Thanks jerks, I have an exam tomorrow and reading this lowered my IQ by 14 points. Dicks.